Inaudible Melodies
by ames 449
Summary: What if Lucas never returned to Tree Hill at the end of Season One? Now he's back to visit Karen but Tree Hill is not the same place he left. How will the people he left behind react to his reappearance? Brucas.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N** What would have happened if Lucas left Tree Hill at the end of Season one and didnt return? This is set in the aftermath of season one/beginning of season two. Its a year later and Lucas is going back to Tree Hill for the first time! Its a definite Brucas. Please review and let me know what you think of the first chapter!

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Charleston…

It was different. It was so much bigger than the place he had grown up. At times Lucas thought about that tiny town, Tree Hill, and wondered whether he missed it. At times he wondered if there was a right answer to that question.

He missed his mom. He missed Haley. In a strange way he even missed Nathan. The two of them had been getting so close before he had left. He wondered absently if he had screwed that relationship up forever and part of him wished he had stayed. He could have gotten closer to his brother given more time. He wasn't such a bad guy, Lucas knew that now but the sixteen year old boy had spent so many years hating Dan's son that he laughed a little at the words. He had never imagined that he could get close to him, let alone hold a civilized conversation with him. Haley had brought them together however. He smiled fondly recalling his best friend and wondered how she was.

"Luke?"

He glanced up from the passenger seat of the car to look at his uncle. Keith was the one thing in his life that felt secure. He had always been there for him; he had never let him down. It seemed strange to think that his own father wanted nothing to do with him when his own brother was such a huge part of Lucas' life.

"What you thinking about kiddo?" Keith asked, taking his eyes off the road for a moment to look at him. "You seem miles away."

Lucas sighed deeply, leaning his right elbow on the window ledge and gazed at the scenery passing him by in a blur of colour.

"Do you regret leaving Tree Hill?"

Keith paused a moment, leaning his arms idly over the steering wheel.

"Sometimes. I sure as hell don't miss the drama!" He said with a smirk that forced a laugh from Lucas.

In truth his early life had been nothing but chaos. In the year since he had moved to Charleston things seemed so much simpler. It was welcoming change. He didn't have the constant conflict of Brooke and Peyton here. He knew he had messed up a lot of stuff to do with them, but even so he hadn't meant to hurt either of them. At times he felt like they both blamed him for how their relationship had turned out. They had been friends since they were kids and Lucas knew he had ruined that. He hoped that with him absent from their lives that they had both managed to reconcile their differences and make a fresh start.

He liked it here. At least in Charleston no one knew him as Dan Scott's abandoned son. There was no stigma. He didn't have the complications of wondering who he was and where he fit into the world. He could be whoever he wanted to be here. Nothing was written in stone, there were no preconceived ideas of who he was. He was just Lucas Scott… there was no baggage with that name now.

It had been hard starting a new school. The kids already had their own friends and were pretty settled after two years together, but even so Lucas had found a niche. Over time he had settled in and made some pretty amazing friends but they were not Haley, or Mouth, or Skillz. He really missed those guys. In his own way he was happy but at times he could remember Tree Hill with fondness. These feelings were few and they were certainly short lived.

"What's up Luke?"

"Nothing." Keith raised his brow but did not push him. His uncle knew him well enough to realise he would talk when he was ready.

"I know going back to Tree Hill is gonna be hard, Luke but its only three days and then we're back to Charleston."

Lucas sighed. Three days seemed like a life time. He was looking forward to seeing Karen but he hoped he could get through his entire visit without bumping into Brooke and Peyton. It was too awkward. There were too many unresolved issues there. Not to mention the fact he had left without even saying goodbye. He doubted his hastily drafted letter explaining things to them had gone down well either. He winced a little at his own cowardice. He should have told them in person he was going.

"Have you told my mom we're coming?" Lucas said finally.

"Nah, I thought we could surprise her."

The last time Lucas had seen Karen was a month ago. She had come to Charleston and spent Lucas' birthday with him. She had tried to act happy but he knew she was miserable. Lucas could tell she missed him and it made him feel guilty for leaving. In truth he had meant to return to Tree Hill after the summer but the longer he left it, the more settled he became until he didn't want to return. Lucas glanced out of the window again, his thoughts wandering as Keith continued to drive back to Tree Hill.

As they neared both Keith's and Lucas' childhood home, the boy was astounded by the sense of nostalgia he felt as the passed familiar structures. He had come to think as Charleston as his home but evidently he had not left Tree Hill completely behind. It almost seemed as if he had never left despite it being a year since he had last been here.

Rounding the corner and heading up the street were Karen lived, Lucas felt strangely apprehensive. It wasn't that he was scared of seeing his mother – he could never be afraid of that – but he wondered what reaction he would get from the others. He had already decided he would stop by and see Nathan and Haley tomorrow and although he had kept in contact with them both for the first few months the periods in-between calling had got longer and longer until he eventually stopped calling altogether. He always felt awkward talking to either of them. He knew that they thought he had simply run away from his problems and although he had in a way he did not regret leaving. He had needed to go at the time. It had been the best thing for him to do. He just hoped they understood that.

Climbing out of the SUV, he dropped his hands to his hips and took a moment to study the house he had grown up in. It hadn't changed at all. He wondered if he had expected it to look different somehow, as if a year's absence could have changed his home so much.

"Come on Luke." Keith said, dropping his hand onto his shoulder and steering him towards the house.

He glanced around nervously as Keith knocked on the door and after a moment it opened. Karen looked momentarily stunned and then threw her arms around her son, laughing.

"Lucas!" She held him tightly for a moment before pulling back. Karen studied him tenderly. "Why didn't you tell me you were coming?" She asked gazing between the pair of them.

"Its called a surprise for a reason, mom." Lucas said grinning. He felt all of his apprehension dissipate in that moment. He had forgotten how much his mother could heal for him. Her embrace could right all wrongs in the world.

"Come in." Karen said after a moment, hastily ushering them into the kitchen. She stared at her son in disbelief as if wondering if he was an apparition stood before her. After a moment she turned and put the kettle on.

"How are you?" Keith asked, taking a seat at the table.

"Good. Things are good." Karen answered, seizing three mugs from the cupboard on the wall. "How is school, Luke?"

"Great." The blonde haired teen replied, his eyes roving around the familiar room. He had not realised how much he had missed this place.

"Are you still playing basketball?"

"Yeah. I finally got a shot on the first team since I last spoke to you."

Basketball. It was the only thing that had kept him sane in the first couple of months in Charleston. He had joined the team in the first week and although he had spent the majority of the first season benched he had finally been given the opportunity to show his Coach what he could do. From that point on Lucas had played in every match, eventually moving onto the First team after a matter of weeks. He knew he was good but even so he felt proud that it was recognized by others. In Tree Hill he had always felt as if he was measured against Dan. People expected him to be great because his father and half-brother were. He had no one to be compare to in Charleston.

"That's wonderful." Karen smiled. Handing them both a steaming mug of coffee. She seized Lucas' hand and rubbed it gently. "I've missed you kid. It's so good to see you."

"I've missed you too ma."

Karen opened her mouth to ask something else but Lucas never found out what it was. The sound of the front door opening broke the conversation as the three of them glanced up. Lucas glanced questioningly at his mother but she merely gave him a small frown.

"Karen? You'll never guess what happened to me today! I was-"

The brunette girl stopped in her tracks, her eyes moving from Karen to Keith before resting on Lucas. She blushed a little, her mouth working to speak but she either couldn't form the words or she chose not to. Lucas glanced down at his mug, suddenly engrossed with it, wincing slightly. She was the one person he hoped he would not meet. He had not expected her to be stood in his mother's kitchen ten minutes after his arrival back in Tree Hill. For the last few days he had run through a list of things he would say to her if he had bumped into her but now, coming face to face with her, his mind seemed irritatingly blank.

"Lucas?" Her voice held a tone of incredulity. Knowing there was nothing else to do but bite the bullet he glanced up at her and forced a smile.

"Hello Brooke."


	2. Chapter 2

For a moment the brunette girl looked as if she was going to flee and Lucas felt ashamed that he had caused that reaction in her. She put up this front of being tough but Lucas knew there was a lot of insecurity underneath that she tried to keep hidden from the world. He had made Brooke insecure and self-conscious and he hated himself for that.

"Brooke, would you like to join us?" Karen said after a moment, trying to break the tension.

"Um…" She exhaled deeply, gesturing as she tried to find the words. "…no, I have things to do."

She turned a fled the room. For a moment Lucas sat with his eyes closed, wondering what he was supposed to do. His head told him to stay here but his heart could not let her go upset. After all he had been the cause of that pain. He got to his feet, muttering an apology to Karen before running to catch her up. Once outside, he glanced up both sides of the street before locating her and jogged to her side.

"Brooke! Hold up!"

"Go away Lucas." She snapped, keeping her pace. After a moment of dogging her steps, he grabbed her arm and she came to a halt. "Get off me." She said in a lifeless voice, not even looking at him. Lucas felt a pang of regret that a girl he had been so close to, so in love with, couldn't even look at him. Had he really been that awful to her? He winced.

"Brooke please talk to me."

She rounded on him, her mouth set tightly. Lucas almost stepped back from her fierce expression but held his ground.

"Talk to you?" She demanded in disbelief, her eyes misting. "It's a pity you didn't do that when you left Luke!"

Although she was more than justified in taking him to task over the way he left he wondered where this anger had come from. It had been a year. Surely she should have moved on? Gotten over him… he frowned deeply, wondering what to say.

"I'm sorry." He concluded lamely.

"Sorry? Sorry!" She exclaimed, her voice going up an octave, wavering with raw emotion. "Well that makes everything all right! Lucas Scott is sorry! He's sorry he just left town without saying goodbye! Did you really think that little of me that you left a note? And not only that Luke, you left it at Peyton's house!"

He rubbed his eyes wearily knowing there was nothing he could say to fix this. It was one of the reasons he had not wanted to face her; no amount of apologising was going to make this situation better.

"I know I hurt you Brooke –"

"Hurt me? You destroyed me Lucas!"

He could see the hurt in her eyes beneath the burning wrath and it pained him greatly. He had not wanted to hurt her so badly. He did love her but he could not deny his feelings for Peyton either. He was so goddamned confused with them both. That was why he had left. He could not choose. He loved them both and his indecisiveness had driven such a huge wedge between the two girls that the only way Lucas could see out of it was to leave. It was not the only reason he had moved out of Tree Hill mind, but it was a vast part of it.

"I never meant for that to happ-"

"Never meant for it to happen? You ruined my life, Lucas! You ruined my friendship with Peyton!" She exhaled deeply trying to get her emotions back under control. "And then you turn up and expect to be friends?"

He frowned. He had not expected her to be in his house. He had come to Tree Hill with the intention of avoiding her completely. He had no will to open old wounds and cause grief to anyone. He studied her for a moment, his eyes roving over her face. She was so beautiful. She had delicate cheek bones and soft eyes. He loved her when she smiled. She was so radiant in that moment, all dimples and warmth, even when she was crying he loved her. Lucas had not given Brooke much thought over the last couple of months. In fact he had tried to bury his past in Tree Hill as deeply as he could but having her stood before him he felt a million and one emotions hitting him. He remembered how he felt about her, how he loved to hold her, to kiss her, to sooth her, to protect her. He longed to reach out his hand and take hers. He wanted to comfort her. He wanted to take away the pain he had caused her but he could not. She told him he had destroyed her and for a moment his guilt was so powerful that he wanted to beg her forgiveness. Instead he merely sighed and spoke quietly.

"I am sorry Brooke and I know that is the last thing you want to hear but its true all the same. I never wanted to hurt you and I didn't come back intending to rub salt in your wounds but I didn't expect you to be at my moms."

Crossing her arms over her chest, she shot him a reproachful glare before shrugging resignedly.

"I moved in with your mom. My parents went bankrupted and I was pretty much homeless." Lucas wished his mother had told him this. A heads up would have been nice. Maybe then he could have prepared better for this situation. As it was he stood before her, unsure and anxious, knowing this was beyond his ability to put right. Part of him wondered if it really mattered. In three days he would be back in Charleston but he had messed up and now it was finally time to face the consequences of his actions. It was time to be a man.

"I had no idea." He muttered.

"Yeah well, my life pretty much sucks but you would know that if you hadn't run away from everything!"

"I didn't run away Brooke!" He scowled hating how everyone thought that.

"Really? 'Cause it sure as hell feels as if you did. You left everyone, Lucas!" She said, tears running down her cheeks. "You cant just leave when things get tough… you cant just go like that. People depend on you."

Lucas watched her weep for a moment before hesitantly pulling her into his arms. She pushed him back, fighting with him until her resolve broke and sobbing, she clung to him.

"You shouldn't have left Lucas. You shouldn't have left." She mumbled between the tears.

"Brooke." He pulled her back and looked into her eyes, his heart close to breaking at the pain he had caused her. "I'm so sorry."

She shrugged.

"What does it matter now? It's too late to fix things."

Lucas frowned at her words as she turned to walk away from him.

"I'm not here to fix things! I know we can never go back to the way we were, I'm not stupid. And I know that I made mistakes and that I hurt a lot of people but god Brooke, don't hate me."

She stopped walking and glanced over her shoulders.

"I don't hate you, Luke." She sighed, her whole body drooping like a wilting flower. "When you left everything changed. I tried to forget you, but I cant and that's the worse part. I don't want to feel like this anymore." Her voice broke as she spoke. "I loved you Lucas and despite all the crap that happened we could have found a way around it. You didn't have to leave."

"I know I reacted badly, Brooke. I know I should have… faced what was going on in my life head on but I wasn't strong enough. I lost you and Peyton and Haley… things with Dan were getting worse and I couldn't do it anymore. I was so tired of fighting everyone."

She turned to him, blinking her tears away.

"I gave you my heart but it was never enough for you."

"Brooke-"

The brunette shook her head.

"I'm sorry Lucas but I can't do this anymore. I can't keep feeling like this about you." She crossed her arms over her chest, sniffling. "Just stay away from me, ok?"

She turned and walked off up the street. Lucas watched her go with a heavy heart. He had never meant to hurt her. He had never wanted her to feel so bad. Momentarily he weighed up going after her but decided against it. She had made it clear where he stood with her. Lucas had never thought he would be affected by this. He thought he had got over Brooke, but standing in the middle of the street watching her walk away from him was possibly one of the most painful moments of his life.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N** Thanks to everyone who reviewed already! You lot read fast! I didnt expect any reviews that quickly. I'm going to try and write the fourth chapter now but I dont know if I will have enough time to finish it tonight. If not I'll post it over the weekend. I hope you all like this chapter!

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Lucas found himself wandering aimlessly after his conversation with Brooke. In some respects he had hoped he could fix things with her but her reaction towards him made him doubt it. He had no idea how to fix this even if he wanted to. She was still so raw about the whole thing. Even if he could make it right he doubted they could ever go back to the way things were before. He had thought his leaving would have made things better but he realised the foolishness of that assumption. He had broken her completely. She was a mess and it was all his fault. Worse still, he only had three days to put this right. Time seemed to be slipping through his fingers like sand.

"Lucas?"

He automatically turned, hearing his name and sighed, wondering if he was in for the next grilling of a life time. He forced a smile as his former best friend and half-brother strolled across the street, hand in hand.

"I thought it was you!" Haley said throwing her arms around him. Lucas hugged her back but when he pulled away he was greeted with an annoyed stare. "Don't they have phones in Charleston?" She demanded.

"Sorry… you know I was meaning to call you back."

Haley sighed.

"You wanted to leave, fine, Luke, but don't push us out."

"I'm not. I've just been-"

"Busy? Too busy to pick up the phone and speak to your supposed best friend?" She gave him a level stare and Lucas exhaled deeply. He should have known he was not going to get away with coming back to Tree Hill easily. There was a lot of anger towards him, anger that he didn't necessarily agree with but he understood.

"So how long are you staying for, man?" Lucas turned to look at his younger brother who was doing his best to diffuse the tension. Haley glanced at her feet, her mouth set.

"Just a couple of days." Lucas muttered. "Haley? I'm sorry." He knew there was little point in letting this situation continue. He needed to sort this now. He knew Haley's placating temperament well enough to know she would not remain angry for long if he apologized. In fact he wasn't even sure she was angry at him. Irritated maybe, but not angry. She looked up at him, rolling her eyes a little.

"I know." She scowled frustrated, although whether it was aimed at herself or him, Lucas wasn't sure. "You fancy grabbing some food?" She asked with a hesitant smile.

"Sure. You joining us Nate?" Lucas glanced at him but the dark haired captain shook his head.

"Nah, I'll catch you later. Make sure you stop by the apartment before you leave."

Lucas nodded, grateful that he was giving him and Haley some time to talk. Shaking hands with Nathan, the captain kissed his wife and headed off up the street.

"Would it be too weird if we ate in Karen's café?"

Lucas laughed a little.

"Why would that be weird? We used to eat in there all the time."

"You mean before you went awol?" he raised a brow but she had already started over the road. Grudgingly he followed her. Evidently she was not about to let this go as easily as he had thought.

The café seemed no different than it had on the night he had left. It smelt the same, it felt the same and despite a slight change of décor it _was_ the same. He pulled up a chair to a table near the window as Haley wandered over to the counter before returning to sit with him. For a moment an awkward silence ensued. It was something Lucas had never experienced before with her and that thought scared him. He had grown so far apart from his best friend that he couldn't even find anything to say to her.

"Hales…" He spoke finally. She glanced up at him. "I'm sorry."

"You keep apologizing Lucas, but do you even know what you're apologizing for?"

He frowned. Now that she mentioned it he didn't have a clue. He was simply doing it because he knew everyone expected him to say that five letter word. He seemed to put so much stock in that word. The more he said it the more he felt as if everything could be made right with it. Haley sighed.

"By your look I'm guessing you don't." Pushing her hair of her face she glanced down at the table. "You hurt a lot of people when you left Lucas."

"I know. And I am sorry if I hurt you Hales."

"You didn't hurt me by leaving Luke. I knew you were going." She gave him a lop-sided stare. "Why didn't you tell Brooke?"

He winced. He had not expected the subject of Brooke to come up so soon in the conversation.

"It was… a mistake, I know this now."

"Well your mistake hurt her. More than you can ever imagine! We had to pick up the pieces of that Lucas."

He rubbed his eyes.

"I never meant to hurt her."

Haley sighed.

"Have you seen her since you got back? She's staying with Karen."

"Yeah… I know. I don't know who was more shocked, her or me."

Nodding, the girl shrugged her shoulders. "You were bound to run into her at some point. Tree Hill is only so big."

"I know. I would have preferred later though. She looked at me with such… hatred." He grimaced as he spoke the word. He loathed himself for causing that look from her.

"She doesn't hate you, Luke." Haley said. "It took her a long time to get over you and having you show up unannounced must have been hard for her."

"Part of me wishes I'd never left." Lucas muttered. "I seem to have ruined everyone's lives."

Haley raised a brow.

"Don't give yourself airs! You're not that important to Tree Hill." She grinned momentarily before it faded into a frown. "You and Brooke had split up long before you left, Luke. It's not as if you ran out on her."

Lucas sighed knowing she was right but part of him still felt guilty. That she was still as hurt as she was with him worried him greatly. He cared so much for her. She had been such a big part of his life and at the time he had never thought anything of leaving her behind but now that he had seen her again he felt regret. He should have stayed; maybe they could have worked it out, even found a way to remain friends. Was he still in love with her? And what about Peyton? He couldn't put his feelings into any semblance of order as the two girls filled his mind. He loved them both for different reasons. How could love be this confusing? When Lucas finally inquired about the blond curly haired girl, Haley shrugged.

"She's a lot tougher than Brooke. You hurt her but she moved on."

That she had moved on somewhat unsettled Lucas. He had not expected her to mope after him but he had expected… something. He wasn't sure what, but some kind of recognition he supposed.

"Are her and Brooke friends again?"

"There are something's that can never be fixed, Luke. They speak but they're not close."

That hit Lucas hard. He had assumed his leaving would make things better for Brooke and Peyton but nothing had changed. What was the point of him leaving? All his going to Charleston had achieved was to hurt the people he cared about. Haley, Brooke… he had thought it was for the best but he saw clearly the affects of his leaving. Nothing was better. He wondered if he had made a mistake in leaving. Sat in his mom's café, in the town he had grown up in, with the greatest friend he had ever had in his life he wondered if he could ever return to Charleston now.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N** Ok this is it for the night. I'm out of inspiration for the moment and also out of time! My social life needs some TLC! But thanks to everyone who has reviewed. chad'sheart13 - yeah I have updated stupidly quick tonight. Sometimes the ideas just flow and I can write alot in a short time! Tonight seems to have been one of those nights! If I wasnt going out I would probably have this finished tonight so you can thank my friends for that! Hope you like this chapter and I'll try and write the next couple of parts tomorrow. Funnily enough this started out as a one shot! Its amazing how these things grow huh??

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Returning home, Lucas' entered the kitchen somewhat subdued. Keith and Karen were sat in the living room, talking. The pair of them glanced up as he entered and for a moment it was like they had never left Tree Hill. The image of them together seemed so normal.

Lucas knew if he came home it would mean leaving Keith. He was not sure he could do that. He had become even closer to his uncle over the last year and he felt as if he was betraying him almost by even thinking about abandoning him. As he caught Karen's eye however he realised with a bolt of clarity that Tree Hill needed him more. His mother smiled but there was a hint of sadness underneath that look. He felt ungrateful suddenly. She had given up on her life and her ambitions to raise him and Lucas had just walked out on her as if she was nothing. Sighing he turned and walked towards his old bedroom, not uttering a word to either of them.

As he pushed the door open he was met with a squeal of indignation. Lucas glanced up and saw Brooke quickly grabbing the towel off the bed, hastily throwing it around her naked body. Quickly he turned his back to her.

"Sorry. I didn't realise you were-" He winced, wondering how much worse he had just made the situation.

"Knock much?!" Brooke demanded her tone laced with irritation.

"Sorry…" He muttered moving towards the door.

"Luke. Wait." He stopped, his hand inches from the handle. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have gone off on you like that this morning."

"I deserved it Brooke."

He felt her hand on his shoulder and glanced around to see her stood behind him, clutching her towel to hold it in place.

"Yeah, you did. But that was such a long time ago and I don't want to make things awkward for Karen. She misses you so much Luke. I know having you here means so much to her."

His brow narrowed. Lucas didn't realise it was possible to feel as guilty as he had in the space of one day. Part of him wished he had not come back. It was like all the ghosts of his past were coming to haunt him.

"I know." He glanced down at his hands. "At the time I thought leaving would solve everything. But all it's done is make things a thousand times worse. I hurt everyone so much. My mom, Haley… even you can't look at me Brooke."

She pulled a face, looking away.

"You hurt me Lucas. But that doesn't mean I stopped caring about you. It was as if you left to punish me."

"I didn't leave because of you, Brooke."

She glanced up at him, her beautiful eyes tear filled, her lashes wet.

"Then why did you leave?"

Lucas sighed, running his fingers through his hair, stumbling over his words.

"I… a million reasons… I don't know. A fresh start I guess." He concluded finally.

"I thought we would work it out Luke. I didn't expect you to up and leave without a word of explanation."

"I'm sorry." He gently caressed her cheek. It was a simple act but it felt so natural, as if they had never been apart. He felt soothed by her and wanted to kiss her so much that his hands trembled as he wondered if he had the guts to move on her. She looked as if she wanted to pull away but it was a few moments before she actually moved.

"I can't do this Lucas. It's too… its too hard!" She wandered over to the other side of the room, putting as much distance as she could between them. "You can't just snap your fingers and expect me to come running! You can't reel me in like this when you're leaving again on Monday!"

"I don't wanna leave. Not like this."

She gave him a disbelieving glare.

"You can't do this to me Lucas! You can't disappear out of my life for a year, flirt with me and then tell me you're coming back!"

"I don't want to hurt you."

"Then don't!" she snapped.

Lucas frowned deeply. He had no idea what she wanted from him but as he stood before her he realised he didn't want to lose her. She meant too much to him.

"Brooke, I love you and I don't want this to be it for us."

She rolled her eyes heavenwards and scowled at him.

"Don't say that! You can't dump that crap on me after running away! It has taken me so long to get over you Lucas! Night after night crying for you. I can't do that again!"

He dropped his hands to his hips, feeling another load of guilt adding to the growing pile. He hated thinking of her crying over him. He hated thinking he had caused that.

"Tell me you don't feel the same way, Brooke. If you say that you don't care about getting back together then I'll forget the whole thing. I'll go back to Charleston. You won't hear from me again, I promise. But if there is a chance for us… I have to know." She gave him a dirty look.

"That's not fair, Luke. You can't ask me to choose whether or not you return to Tree Hill! Who the hell do you think you are? I don't know if there is a future for us. I still…" she paused running her tongue over her lips as she gathered her thoughts. "I still care about you, of course I do, but so much has happened between us. I don't know if I can forget it all as if it never happened!"

Lucas knew he was being unfair asking her to make a decision but he knew in his heart however that he to take one last shot at her. He couldn't walk away from Brooke again. Knowing he was about to make the toughest decision of his life, he sighed deeply. He hoped Keith would understand. He hoped he could put his life in Tree Hill back together again after such a long period away from the town. Most of all he hoped he could fix his relationship with Brooke. As he studied her he knew she was the love of his life and that being apart from her again would kill him. In that moment he knew he would have to leave his life in Charleston behind and return to the town in which he had grown up. After all, there was only one Tree Hill.


	5. Chapter 5

Lucas awoke sometime after midday the following day. Opening his eyes blearily he sat up groaning as his back twinged. He had given Keith the spare room - since Brooke had his old room - and had taken the sofa which he was now regretting. His back was killing. Stretching the knots out of his muscles he rose and rubbing the sleep from his eyes he wandered into the kitchen. Karen was cleaning up seemingly engrossed in what she was doing, but when Lucas muttered a greeting she glanced up at him.

"How did you sleep?" She asked.

"Great." He lied, kissing her cheek and moving over to the fridge. "Where's Keith?"

"He's gone to see Coach Durham."

Lucas nodded, wondering himself how his mentor was. Pulling a cartoon of fresh orange out, he grabbed a small tumbler and poured it in, taking a long sip.

"And Brooke?" He asked.

"She said something about cheerleading."

"Something's never change, huh?" He said, slipping into a chair at the table.

He wasn't sure how to start the conversation he knew he needed to have with Karen and so he allowed a silence to envelop the room. He really didn't want to hurt Keith but he couldn't see anyway around it. His place was here, in Tree Hill. Charleston had been nothing more than him running away from his problems and he saw that clearly now. He picked absently at the cartoon, unravelling the plastic, his eyes staring at nothing.

"Lucas?" He glanced up as Karen wandered over to him. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing." He forced a smile. Tilting her head to the side slightly, she gave him a sceptical look. Scowling, he realised there was no point lying to her, she would wheedle the truth out of him eventually. "Coming back to Tree Hill was harder than I thought it would be."

Karen sighed, pulling a chair out and sitting opposite him at the table. She took his hand and smiled faintly at him.

"You have a lot of memories here Lucas."

"I know, I just… I never thought I missed it. When I left I just wanted to get as far away from here as possible"

"And now?"

He glanced up at her, wondering if he should say anything. It would be so easy to just return to Charleston and not have to deal with anything here. Taking a deep breath he knew he had to stop running. In his heart he knew Keith would understand.

"I miss it. I miss you, Haley, the guys at the River Court, Brooke."

"Lucas, this is still your home." He went silent, his mind mulling over what he was going to say. It was a couple of moments before he spoke.

"I love Keith and I don't want to hurt him or let him down but…." He hesitated. "I wanna come home. I left a mess behind me mom and I know I might never put it right but I think I owe the people I care about to at least try."

"Keith will understand Lucas. He just wants what's best for you."

"I don't want to leave him mom, but I don't think I can leave Tree Hill again."

"You can come home whenever you want to."

He winced slightly.

"What about Brooke? She lives here now, this is her home too."

"Brooke is welcome to stay here, Lucas, but you are my son. She will understand that."

Her words only served to make him feel even more guilty. Not only had he crushed Brooke by leaving, his moving back to Tree Hill would potentially render her homeless. He doubted she would want to stay in the same house as him. Sighing, the boy wondered if he could ever do anything right. Every decision he made seemed to hurt someone.

"I'm sorry mom." He muttered.

"For what?"

"Letting you down. Leaving. Everything." He sighed.

"You have never let me down Lucas. I'm so proud of the man you are becoming." She smiled at him so warmly that for a moment Lucas almost believed her words.

"Thanks mom." He forced a smile in return but it faded quickly. "I don't know who will be worse to tell I'm moving back: Keith…or Brooke."

"They'll understand."

Sighing, he rose. "I hope so."

"Where are you going?" Karen inquired.

"To shower so at least I smell nice when I ruin everyone's lives." He paused turning back to her. "Is it possible to drown yourself in an inch of water?" He asked sardonically earning a level stare from Karen.

Once he was showered he borrowed Karen's car and headed to the outskirts of Tree Hill. He realised that there was one visit he had to make before he could move back but he was dreading this meeting even more than the one with Brooke. As he pulled up outside the house he glanced up at the white cladded building and took a deep breath. He wondered what response he would get. He doubted he would be welcomed with open arms but even so he did not have the head space to argue. Climbing somewhat hesitantly out of the car, he made his way slowly up to the door and tried the handle. As usual it was unlocked. Something's certainly never changed. Opening the door he stepped into the white washed hallway, the wooden floor creaking beneath his feet. Stopping to listen he strained his ears to hear any sound of life. Faintly from upstairs he could hear the dull moaning of music and shouted out a greeting. Getting no response he hesitantly headed up the familiar stairs and to the room at the end of the landing and taking a deep breath he moved to stand in the door frame.

She was sat at her desk, engrossed in something she was scrawling in a sketchbook, her blonde curly hair just reaching her shoulders. Lucas glanced around the familiar room noticing she had more drawings tacked to the wall and with a heavy heart his eyes rested on a picture of what was without a doubt him leaving in a car with her watching him leave. Above the sketch written in block letters were the words "Everyone leaves." Uncertainly he knocked on the door.

Her head spun at the sound and for a moment she stared blankly at him before dropping her eyes back to her pad.

"I thought you had left town." She muttered.

"Peyton… I'm sorry."

She glanced up at him, shrugging her shoulders slightly. "Whatever Lucas."

"I didn't come here to upset you."

"Then why did you come here?"

"To apologize."

She placed her pad on the desk and turned fully to face him.

"You can say sorry Luke, but you have to mean it and I'm not sure you do."

His brow furrowed at that. What could he possibly respond to that? He understood that Peyton was angry with him - she had every right to be – but even so he had hoped they could sort things out enough to remain friends.

"I know how I left was wrong, and I am sorry for that. I should have told you to your face that I was going."

"You're damn right you should have." He winced at her tone.

"Peyton I don't know what else I can say to you."

"Then don't say anything Luke." She snapped, crossing her arms over her chest. "You hurt everyone so much when you left, especially Brooke. You didn't even stop to think about what leaving would do to your friends!"

"I know." He sighed. "All I can do is say sorry and hope that in time you will forgive me."

She lowered her eyes, a scowl plastered across her face but when she spoke her tone was softer.

"Are you back for good?"

"Yeah. Although I'm not sure why. I'm not exactly being welcomed back with open arms."

"What did you expect?" She demanded incredulously.

"I don't know."

Sighing, Peyton rose and sank onto the bed, gesturing for him to join her. After a moment, Lucas slipped next to her. It felt as if nothing had changed as he sat beside her. It was as if he had never left. This scene of the two of them sat talking in her room was so familiar that he wished he had never left and jeopardized his friendship with her. As he studied her he tried to fathom out what his feelings for her actually were. He loved her; he could not deny that, but was he in love with her? The question both baffled and frightened him. Was it possible to love two people at the same time? He had always believed that everyone had one soul mate that they were destined to spend their entire life with but he loved them both so much.

""Its gonna take time for everyone to come to terms with this stuff, Luke. You just… you gotta give everyone space. Things changed a lot when you left. You were the block holding everyone together." She tucked her hands underneath her legs and shrugged again. "You can't expect everything to go back to the way it was over night."

"At least you're talking to me. Brooke won't even look at me."

Peyton looked uncomfortable at the mention of her former best friend for a moment.

"Lucas, Brooke loves you. I don't think I've ever seen her this way about a guy ever. When you left she took it to heart. You just gotta show her that you're not the guy who walks out on her when things get hard."

He glanced at her and was soothed by her warm smile. Aside from Haley, Peyton was the only other person he could talk to like this about anything. She always listened to his crap, and even now when she was supposed to be angry with him she was giving him advice. She was always there for him. Yes, he did love her, but as a friend. He had not felt the same heart stopping sensation with Peyton as he had with Brooke. If anything their time apart had made him realise his feelings. His mind for the first time in years was blissfully clear.

"What are you smiling about?" Peyton asked.

"You." He said. "As usual you found a way to help me. Thanks."

She frowned deeply at him.

"I didn't do anything."

"Yeah, you did. You listened." He rose. "I don't know if we can ever go back to the way things were Peyton but I really hope we can. You're the best friend I've ever had."

She looked slightly taken aback by his words but Lucas felt as if a weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Finally he felt ready to make a move with Brooke. He didn't have his confusion of Peyton standing in the way any more. Although he hated that he had caused so much hurt by leaving he was also grateful that he had done so. It had put a lot of his life into perspective. For once he felt like his life had direction and that direction was Brooke.


	6. Chapter 6

Keith took the news Lucas wanted to return home with a pinch of salt. Despite being sad that he would be leaving, Keith was supportive of his decision. Lucas felt a sense of loss at watching him drive away but he knew deep down it was for the best. He needed to be here.

Since his conversation with Brooke she had gone out of her way to avoid him. She left the house before he woke and didn't come in till he was in bed. She had moved her things into the spare room and yielded his room to him but he felt no pleasure in having ousted her. It was a good three days later when he finally managed to catch her. She was sat in the kitchen eating breakfast when he entered the room. Hastily she rose, and turned to leave.

"Brooke… this is ridiculous. We live in the same house! We cant keep avoiding one another forever." She glanced at her mouth setting into a slack expression.

"I'm not avoiding you Lucas, I just don't have anything to say to you." He hated hearing those words come out her mouth and wished with every breath in his body that she would take them back.

"Can we not talk about this at least?"

"Talk about what?"

"You… me… this whole situation."

"There is no situation, Luke. You and me are over. Maybe you should just get over it. It took me a year but you seem to be a lot better at avoiding your feelings than me so you'll probably be fine in an hour. If you stay in Tree Hill that long and don't run away again that is." The venom in her tone hurt him deeply but in the rational part of his mind he realised she was trying to hurt him the way he had hurt her.

"I know I was a jerk to you and I am sorry. I know you can't forgive me just like that but Brooke I love you. It might have taken me a while to admit it to myself but I do love you, more than you will ever know and if you can't forgive me today or in two weeks, six months, six years, it doesn't matter because I'll wait forever for you to be ready."

Brooke sighed deeply, speaking softly.

"Then I guess you will be waiting a long time."

Lucas felt frustrated as she grabbed her coat and left the house. He knew he had a lot to make up for but he didn't know how much more of this he could take. He hated being detached from Brooke and he hated the way she looked at him.

Reaching for his keys he headed out of the house and made his way down to the river court. He needed to think and it was the one place where he could find peace. It was just after nine in the morning and although the sun hung high on the eastern horizon the court was deserted. Pulling the hood of his sweatshirt down he pulled his ipod out, set it to a random play list and shoved the headphones into his ears. He wanted to drown out the world. He wanted to forget what Brooke had said to him but as he bounced the ball before him a couple of times he realised he would never be able to forget the words she had spoken to him. _You and me are over. _It seemed so final. So cold. Pulling his arm back he lined up with the hoop and released the ball. There was a dull thud as it hit the edge of the metal rim, missing its target. Dropping his hands onto his hips he watched the ball rolling off and with a deep sigh walked over to pick it up. Seizing the ball he set himself up for a second shot and threw the ball again. It missed completely this time, not even touching the hoop. Scowling he recovered the ball and tried the shot again.

After missing for the tenth time he angrily threw the ball across the court, trying to vent his frustration. Basketball was the one thing that kept him sane but now he couldn't even do that right. This whole situation with Brooke was niggling in the back of his mind, distracting him from everything. Brushing his hair back he turned to get ball only to be greeted by the one person he never wanted to see again: his father, Dan Scott.

Carrying the basketball under his arm he was almost sneering as he approached his estranged son. He was wearing a smart black suit with a deep plum coloured shirt that Lucas could only guess the cost of. As usual the site of his wealth irritated him. His mother had struggled for years to bring Lucas up and Dan had never given her a dime. Considering the money he had the injustice of it drove Lucas crazy. He threw the ball at Lucas, who caught it confidently. Tucking it under his right arm, he pulled his headphones out ready for the conflict he knew was going to come.

"It's good to see your catching skills are a lot better than your shooting skills." Dan smirked.

"What do you want Dan?"

"I heard you were back in town." Lucas sighed.

"It's nice that you want to catch up, but I'm busy."

"Shooting hoops? I noticed. I was watching you. You really suck." Dan laughed. "Didn't they have basketball in Charleston?"

Part of Lucas told him not to get dragged into this mindless argument but Lucas' mood was foul and he wanted to take his hurt, his frustration and his anger out on something. Dan proved the perfect vessel.

"Didn't you have a wife and a son? Oh wait, didn't they both leave you?" Lucas snarled, unable to keep the spite out of his voice. Dan didn't look at all perturbed by his words however and continued to taunt him with that smug self-righteous smile he always wore.

"Nathan will realise how hard the real world is and come crawling back."

"Well it's been over a year since he emancipated from you. I'm pretty sure if he was going to fall apart it would have happened before now. Besides if it came to that I would work three jobs to keep him away from you."

"I didn't realise you and Nathan were so close. It would be touching except you seem to have forgotten how much he loathes you."

"Loathed, Dan. Past tense." Dan gave him a dirty look.

"Stay away from my son. He doesn't need you corrupting him."

"I'm your son too, Dan, unfortunately."

"You are nothing to do with me, Lucas. You never have been and you never will be." He shook his head. "I never thought you would amount to much. If I would have had my way you wouldn't even be here. You were the world's worst hangover for me."

Lucas resisted the urge to throw the ball at him, his blood boiling. It was bad enough that his father had blatantly abandoned him to bring up his other child but telling him that he hated his existence altogether wounded Lucas deeply. He would never let Dan see that however and so simply glared back at him.

"I'm sure my mom thinks the same of you. Deb probably does too."

"I don't understand why you came back here Lucas. I had just got used to moving around my home town without seeing your face, reminding me of my mistakes." He smiled broadly at him. "You might want to keep practicing your jump shot, kid. With a throw like that you'll be lucky if they let you play on the girl's team."

He gave him one last serpentine smirk before turning and walking away. His mind was too hurt to deal with him today. He already felt rejected by Brooke and Dan's further reject only served to pull another chunk from his temperament. he felt his mood sinking even lower as he mulled over the words Dan and Brooke had both said to him. He didn't know how much more rejection he could mentally withstand. He was breaking. He had left a life in Charleston with good friends, no stigma and no heartache and had returned to the lion's den were everybody seemingly wanted to make him suffer. Had he been a weaker person he probably would have rang Keith immediately and gone back to Charleston but he would not be cowed.

Lucas watched Dan go and once he was out of sight he launched the basketball across the court, screaming with fury. He hated that man! In that moment he remembered one of the reasons why he had left Tree Hill. His stupid, selfish, idiot father Dan Scott was one of them.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N** Apologies, this is another short chapter which I know is irritating some people but unfortuantly I need to move the story on and this small fillers are necessary. Hope you enjoy this one. Let me know what you think.

* * *

Lucas settled back into his life in Tree Hill High with surprising ease. Both Skills and Mouth had greeted him like a long lost brother and after a couple of weeks Whitey had him back on the basketball team. It felt good to be in Ravens shirt again. However, Brooke was still giving him the silent treatment and although Peyton spoke to him when she saw him, she didn't go out of her way to seek him out. He was grateful that Nathan and Haley were still speaking to him and didn't hold his leaving Tree Hill against him.

Heading to his locker after class he opened it shoving his text books onto the shelf inside. Hearing a familiar voice he glanced up as Haley bounded over him. Her hair was pulled back at the nape of her neck but she kept tucking incessantly at a few stray strands of hair that had escaped her band.

"Hey friend." She grinned. "What are you doing tonight?"

"Nothing. Why?" He said, closing his locker door and shrugging his rucksack onto his back. it was amazing how easily they had slipped back into their friendship despite the long absence between them. With Haley Lucas felt most at ease. He didn't have to grovel and apologize for his previous behaviour and there was no side to her. She was just glad to have him back.

"You are now. Tric, tonight. Peyton's hosting some rock thingy. She asked us to come, a sort of make up the numbers thing."

"Asked you to come? I doubt that invitation extended to me, Hales."

"Well that's where you're wrong mister." She smiled. "Besides, your mom owns Tric, it's not as if they stop you. If needs be just pull rank, or failing that tell the bouncers they're selling crack." It was said innocently but she flashed a wicked grin.

"Rebel." He replied, shaking his head. "Is uh…Brooke going?"

Haley gave him a knowing look.

"Are you and Brooke even making any headway? It's been over a month since you got back, I would have expected you to be back together by now."

"Even if we could sort things out, she won't speak to me about it."

They both began to walk down the corridor of the school and outside into the parking lot, the warm sunshine hitting them, bathing them in heat. Lucas had tried to sort things out with Brooke but the more he tried to talk to her the more she closed herself off to him. He had come to the conclusion that nothing he said to her was going to make her resolve wane. She would come around in her own time and no amount of pressure from Lucas would force her to take him back. Haley stopped walking, shielding her eyes from him.

"You will sort it out, Luke. You've just got to give her time." She sighed before perking up again. "So tonight? You'll be there?"

Lucas pretended to think about it for a moment earning a playful punch from Haley before finally agreeing.

"You better be there!" She threatened as they continued to walk.

* * *

When Lucas arrived at Tric it was heaving with people. In the crowd it took him a couple of minutes to locate a familiar face and weaving his way through the mass of people he wandered over to Peyton. Leaning over the bar she glanced up at him as he approached and flashed him a smile.

"Hey Luke."

"Hey." He replied sinking onto the bar stool next to her. "Where is everyone?"

"Sat in the corner." She absently gestured behind her. Following her line of sight he saw Nathan, Haley, Skills, and Mouth sat at a table laughing and joking together.

"No Brooke?"

Peyton glanced up at him. "She'll be here. I guess things with you two aren't going so well."

"You can say that again."

"If you two are meant to be together Luke, it will happen."

He nodded, hating the finality in her words. If it was meant to happen… what if it wasn't? What if he was chasing a dream that could never be achieved?

"Hey! You made it!" Lucas glanced up as Haley appeared, hugging him tightly. "Peyton, you need to come and save me from the guys. If I hear one more thing about basketball I swear to god I'll scream!"

Peyton laughed.

"It is pretty dull isn't it?"

Haley nodded and then turned to Lucas, raising her finger.

"Don't even think about joining the basketball talk either."

Lucas held his hands up defensively, grinning a little at her indignant expression.

"I wouldn't dream of it Hales."

As he glanced around the club his eyes found Brooke. She was wearing a backless scarlet coloured top covered in sparkling sequins and a pair of low cut jeans. Muttering an apology to Haley and Peyton, he wandered over to her somewhat hesitantly.

"Hey, can we talk?" she looked a little uncomfortable at being cornered by him.

"Luke… oh erm… hey. I didn't expect you to be-"

She broke off as a tall, dark haired guy walked over to her, draping his arms around her shoulders. There was a closeness between them that immediately told Lucas they were dating; a fact which was confirmed by him leaning down to kiss her. His stomach sank, a cold unsettling feeling bubbling there. That they weren't talking was bad enough but seeing her with another guy was like a hot poker being shoved into his heart. There was an awkward moment and he wanted to turn and leave but he couldn't do so without being rude. Brooke pulled a face, clearly embarrassed. The man, obviously sensing the tension, glanced between the two of them but Lucas was staring at Brooke, unable to believe she could rub salt in his wounds this blatantly.

"A friend of yours?" The dark haired man asked.

Brooke opened her mouth to reply but Lucas couldn't stand to hear her referring to him as nothing more than a friend. He needed to get out of this situation. He needed to find an excuse to leave but he was just so shocked at seeing her with another guy that his mind couldn't function.

"I'll see you later." Lucas said lamely, turning away, his pride hurt.

"Lucas! Lucas, wait."

Ignoring her he headed into the men's room and finding it empty he walked over to the sinks. Leaning on the basins he studied himself in the mirror. He felt empty. Devoid of all emotion. She had moved on. She had come with some guy he didn't know and he had kissed her. She was dating someone else. What chance was there for him and Brooke now? Had she ever loved him? Had he just been living in hope that she would forgive him and come back to him? He closed his eyes, the thoughts wheeling around his mind making him dizzy. How could she do that to him? She knew how much he wanted her. Had he not spent the last month trying to make it up to her?

Without warning he felt a crushing pain across his chest. He gasped before he could stop the sound leaving his lips, his hand spreading over his heart as if this simple act could stop this throbbing agony. It was like no pain he had ever experienced. It spread across the top of his chest and down his right arm, his legs trembling beneath his weight. It was as if a huge clamp had been put over his wind pipe and he could not catch his breath. He could feel his heart racing beneath his ribs, pounding so hard that it felt as if it would explode any second. Shakily he grabbed for the edge of the sink as his head swam but missed. His last image before he was engulfed in darkness was the floor hurtling towards him and then sharp pain reverberating through his hip as he hit the tiled ground.


	8. Chapter 8

Brooke watched Lucas walk off with a heavy heart. She had not wanted to rub his face in it. She had not even known he would be here tonight. The look in his eyes haunted her momentarily. It had been an accusary glare, as if he believed she was doing this to hurt him. Sighing she turned to the dark haired boy at her side. She had met Adam three months ago in a bar and she had been so bowled over by the amount of attention she had received from him. He was sweet and caring and he always made her feel good about herself. When Lucas had left for Charleston she had found it difficult to trust guys again but Adam made it so easy. She wasn't sure why she hadn't told any of her friends or even Karen about her new boyfriend, but she was sick of hiding him. She hadn't been the one who had left. Why should she feel bad about moving on?

"Shall we get a drink?" She said finally.

"Yeah sure." He smiled warmly at her and took her hand leading her over to the bar. Once he had bought her a drink, she directed him over to the table were her friends were all sat talking and laughing. They stopped as she approached, glancing between her and the man hanging off her arm.

The tension was unbearable. She felt as if they were all looking at her, judging her, hating her because she had not taken Lucas back. Why could they not see her side of it? Who was looking after her feelings? After a moment, Skills got to his feet and offered her his seat.

"What's up girly?" He said in his usual bantering tone. "Who is the home boy with you?"

"This is Adam." She flashed him a grateful smile as the others greeted the dark haired boy.

"Have you seen Luke yet?" Haley asked her tone slightly reproachful.

"Uh, yeah. I think he went to the bathroom."

She gave her a sour look, annoyed by the tone she had used with her. Why was Lucas seen as the angel in this? Why was she being treated as if she had done something wrong? He was the one who had left. Why was she the bad one for getting on with her life? Was she supposed to sit and wait for him to decide he wanted her? She did still love Lucas, there was no denying that, but her pride was too hurt for her to let him back into her life. She didn't trust him anymore plus there was the whole situation with him and Peyton that constantly hung over her head like a rain cloud. How could she be with him knowing that her so-called best friend and her former boyfriend were in love? Holding her head high she refused to let them make her feel bad about Adam.

After a moment the conversation continued and Brooke allowed herself to breathe a sigh of relief. She glanced at Adam, giving him a suggestive smirk before sipping on her drink. She liked this guy. He was smart and he was good to her and more importantly he hadn't met Peyton yet. Brooke wondered absently if her friendship with her childhood companion could ever be fixed but she couldn't imagine how. Peyton had betrayed her in the worst kind of way. There were three things you never did to your best friend. Firstly you never date their brothers/cousins/uncles/dads, secondly shopping was a girl's domain, guys were never and should never be invited and thirdly you never fall in love with your best friend's boyfriend. Brooke had been crushed by Peyton and Lucas' actions and her paranoia of the whole situation wouldn't let her move on.

Her thoughts were broken suddenly as shouting from the other side of the club resounded over the din of the band. Glancing up she watched the commotion breaking out with idle interest. No doubt there was some kind of brawl going on and all that testosterone-driven-guy-fighting bored her. She turned back to her drink but Nathan rose from his seat to follow Haley as she edged towards the ensuing chaos. She watched them disappear into the crowd of people momentarily before turning back to Adam.

"Trust something that Peyton organised to cause a riot." She muttered rolling her eyes. Adam frowned a little.

"I don't think they're fighting babe."

Brooke shrugged. "Well whatever." She smiled leaning forward and brushing her lips against his.

"Brooke." Pulling back from Adam she glanced up at Skills who was stood at the side of the table. He looked wired and for an unknown reason she felt as if an icy hand had grabbed her heart.

"What's wrong?"

"It's Luke, girl. He collapsed in the bathroom."

Brooke felt the blood drain from her face and was on her feet before she even realised.

"Well is he ok?"

"I dunno. They called 911 but he don't look so hot."

She almost forgot about Adam until he grabbed her hand to stop her running over to check on Lucas.

"Brooke, what's going on?"

"My friend, Lucas, he's collapsed. I've got to make sure he's ok."

"Brooke…" he increased his grip on her arm and she glanced at him. "Give me a call later if you need anything."

She flashed him a faint smile before rushing over to where Haley and Nathan were stood. She prayed Lucas would be ok. She couldn't lose him. Not like this. Especially not after the way she had treated him for the last couple of weeks. She had blocked him out completely and now she felt so guilty, wondering if he was going to be ok. If anything happened to him, she had no idea what she would do.

* * *

Waiting rooms… the bane of all hospitals. They were like huge silent sterile hell holes, and every person in it is waiting to be told the worst possible news. Maybe that is why they call them waiting rooms. The silent solitude of every individual sat within those four walls, each thinking their own morbid thoughts, each wondering if their loved one will make it, each wondering if the next doctor who enters will be the one to tell them they are dead, was enough to drive any sane person to despair. Brooke paced the room with short steps, her mind mulling over the worse possible case: that Lucas was dead. She raised her gaze to study Nathan and Haley who were sat next to one another, hand in hand. Haley looked so worried, her brow knitted tightly, resting her head on Nathan's broad torso.

Although Skills and Mouth had both gone home after a while Peyton had insisted on staying. Brooke realised her former best friend cared about what happened to Lucas but the sight of her here offended her. She was the reason Brooke and Lucas had split, she was the reason Lucas had left and now she was the reason Brooke felt so guilty. As if she knew she was being watched, Peyton glanced up and gave her a 'not here' expression. Knowing she was right and that this was not the time nor the place for their petty squabbling to occur, she tore her gaze from her and rested her eyes on Karen. She looked so subdued, her face lined with worry, her stance tense. Brooke felt a stab of fear remembering how Lucas had looked when the paramedics had brought him out of the bathroom unconscious. His skin pale and clammy, they had hooked him up to some kind of portable heart machine and placed an oxygen mask over his face, wheeling him into the ambulance and zooming off with the sirens blurring. She knew there was something wrong with his heart, but she didn't really understand it properly. Nathan kept telling the paramedics he had HCM and although she knew she should have known more about his condition she actually realised that if Nathan hadn't been present she couldn't have told them anything. Potentially she could have endangered his life further because she was ignorant of his medical condition. She hated how self-absorbed she was a times and this situation only proved that point. She felt so closed off from what was happening. She needed to know why he had collapsed and if he was going to be ok. She needed answers.

After what seemed like an eternity, a doctor garbed in a white coat entered and called for Karen.

"My son, Lucas? Is he all right?" Karen demanded.

"Maybe we should discuss this somewhere more private, Miss Roe?" Karen nodded and apprehensively followed the man out of the room. Brooke sighed wondering how long it would be before they knew anything.

"You saw him, just before he went to the bathroom?" it took Brooke a moment to realise Haley was speak to her. There was an accusing note in her tone that due to her frame of mind the cheerleader did not notice.

"Yeah. He seemed fine." She chewed anxiously on her nails.

"Fine? You're the last person to speak to him Brooke and ten minutes later he's in the back of an EMT! What the hell did you say to him?"

Brooke glanced up at her and gave her a puzzled look. Was she blaming her for Lucas collapsing?

"This isn't my fault, Haley."

"Really? Do you know how much stress you are putting him under with these mind games?" Haley drawled. Nathan tried to cut her off but she shrugged her husband off and continued relentlessly. "He has tried everything to get you to talk to him, to even just be civil to him and you have thrown it all in his face."

"Hold on!" Brooke snapped. "He and my best friend fall in love, he leaves for a year and then comes back expecting me to just forgive him and I'm the bitch in this?!" She snorted incredulously. "You're supposed to be smart Haley, how the hell do you work out this is my fault?"

"He has a heart condition Brooke! Stressing him out exacerbates it!"

"Don't you dare put this on me!" Brooke said, turning her head away from her so that she would see her crying. Had she caused this? She hadn't understood his heart condition and she had been fairly awful to Lucas but she had never intended this. She hadn't realised the severity of his condition.

"Just figure out what you want from Lucas, Brooke and tell him. Until you know just stay the hell away from him." she snapped sinking back into her brooding mood.

Brooke tried to forget what Haley had said but as the minutes ticked by she began to think maybe she had caused this. The guilt was unbearable. What if he died and it was her fault? She hastily wiped the tears from her eyes but they escaped quicker than she could mop them up.

It was some moments later before Karen returned to the room. Brooke felt her entire body freeze from the feet up as she saw her expression.

"Karen?" Haley was on her feet in an instant. "Is Lucas ok?"

"He's had a um… a heart attack." Her tone was numb as she spoke the words and for a moment Brooke didn't register what she had said.

"He's gonna be ok though? Right?" Haley asked again.

"The doctors say the first twenty-four hours are the most critical. They won't know the extent of the damage until they have run some more tests."

Brooke felt as if her whole world was crashing in around her ears. She felt responsible for this and for the pain and distress Karen was feeling. Haley's words weighed heavily on her as she sat as silently sobbed in the corner. Had she been playing games with Lucas? She hadn't meant to. It was just too painful for her to be around him but now she was faced with the possibility of losing him she wanted him more than ever.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N** Ok, I know I'm usually really quick with the updates but I think this will be the only chapter I post tonight. I have LOTS of work and a job interview to prepare for. As usual thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. I didn' t think this story would be as well received as it has been so thanks! Let me know what you think of this chapter. Its a bit of a filler but we have to start getting towards Brooke and Luke reconciling.

* * *

**Guilt**. The irrepressible feeling of being unable to make amends. It is one of those emotions that eats you from the inside out and no matter how much you try to push it from your mind its impossible. It's like a cancer, a disease that can't be uprooted. There is no cure, no medicine and no procedure in the world that can fix it. The wretched feeling of helplessness that is associated with guilt is the worst part of all and until it is removed no words in the world can make that emotion disappear. 

Brooke was not used to this feeling. She was used to being in control to an extent and it unsettled her. She knew she should have gone home hours ago but she could not bring herself to move from the uncomfortable plastic chair positioned in the waiting room. Despite being just after 3am she was not tired. Her grief kept her awake, her thoughts kept her going. Had she caused Lucas' heart attack? In her own way she knew his condition was nothing to do with her but Haley's blame sat heavily within the dark vaults of her mind. She couldn't shake her words no matter how hard she tried.

"Brooke?" She glanced up as Karen entered the waiting room.

"Is Lucas ok?" She asked, unable to keep the anxiety out of her voice.

"He's ok. Doctors say we just have to wait for him to wake up."

Karen wandered over and sank down beside her, taking her hand.

"Why don't you go home and sleep? You've been sat here all night."

"I can't. I need to know he's ok."

Karen smiled fondly at her, tucking her hair behind her ears. Since Brooke had moved in with her she had begun to look upon her as a mother figure. Her own parents were useless and didn't care about her at all but there was a warmth and loving side to Karen that made Brooke feel safe. Her tears came thick and fast and she tried desperately to hold them back and be strong for Karen but she could not.

"I'm sorry." Brooke murmured between sobs.

Karen pulled her into a tight embrace, stroking her hair and muttering soothingly under her breath.

"Shh. Don't cry. Lucas will be fine Brooke."

"You don't understand." She gulped out, sobbing still. "I caused him to collapse."

Karen pulled back studying her.

"Whatever gave you that idea?"

"It's true. All this stuff between me and Lucas can't have been good for his heart."

Laughing a little Karen shook her head.

"Brooke, Lucas has a heart condition that causes the muscle in his heart to grow in the wrong place. It means the blood can't get where it's supposed to. Lucas collapsed tonight because his heart couldn't get oxygen around his body. Nothing you said or did would have caused that. It's just one of those things."

Glancing up at her through wet lashes she finally felt the reprieve she had longed for. As easily as guilt over takes a person, reassurance can vanquish it in a second. Karen's words helped her greatly. She wiped her tears away and felt somewhat relieved.

"Why don't you go home and get some sleep, huh?" Karen said softly.

"Can I see Lucas before I go?"

"Sure."

Karen rose and led her to a small side room off the main corridor. Taking a deep breath, Brooke entered the room alone. She gulped as her eyes rested on Lucas' unconscious form. Hooked up to various machines, the dull droning beeping filled her ears as she hesitantly took a step towards the bed. He looked so small and weak lying on the bed; a shadow of his former self. She could hear the oxygen hissing through the nasal canula as she neared him and trembling a little she pulled the chair up to his bedside, sinking on to it.

She wasn't sure what she should say or do but she took his hand in hers and glanced at his perfectly still face. His blonde hair was brushed back off his forehead and his eyes were closed. He looked so peaceful. So still. If it hadn't been for the fact she could see his chest falling and rising she would have believed him dead.

"Luke…?" She muttered tentatively. "I'm… I'm sorry."

Sighing she glanced behind her and saw through the glass pane in the door Karen sat on the chairs outside. She looked so dishevelled, so wracked with anxiety.

"You need to wake up. Your mom… she needs you Lucas. We all need you here." She paused, feeling a little ridiculous talking to his sleeping form but somehow it seemed important to tell him this. "I know I've pretty much been a bitch since you got back but you hurt me so much. I was… I guess I was angry with you. You kissed my best friend and then you just left without so much as an explanation as though I didn't even matter." She glanced down at her hand in his. "I gave you my heart Luke but it wasn't enough for you."

She allowed a silence to envelop the room for a moment, gathering her thoughts. She was so confused about things. Part of her wanted to hate Lucas for what he had done to her but seeing him lying there was the hardest thing in the world. She could forgive all evils if he would just wake up. She hated seeing him in this cold sterile room fighting for his life. She didn't want him to give up. She would never admit it to him but she needed him.

"I'm sorry about Adam." She continued after a moment, "I shouldn't have brought him tonight. It was… I swear I wasn't trying to rub your face in it. I really care about him. I met him a while ago. He's a good guy and he made me feel worth something. I just wanted to be happy Lucas. When you left I didn't think I could ever find happiness again but Adam…" she broke off, sighing again, almost afraid to admit to him what she was feeling. Finally she spoke. "He's not you, Lucas. I love _you_. I always have and I always will."

Standing she leaned over and kissed him on the forehead, studying his face for a moment before turning and leaving the room. It had been the hardest thing for her to admit but she did still love Lucas Scott.

Coming out of the room, Karen rose as Brooke gently closed the door behind her. Giving her a warm smile, Brooke embraced her, feeling somewhat relieved at letting her feelings out. Ok, so Lucas couldn't hear her and he wouldn't know what she had said but it had been a liberating experience.

With a list of things to get for both Luke and Karen she headed home feeling better about things. She knew Lucas would wake up eventually and she also knew his heart attack had been nothing to do with her. With those revelations she could rest now. She could find peace. Changing into her pjs, she crawled into bed and fell straight to sleep.

It was just after 8.30am when the repetitive hammering on the front door woke the brunette. Sleepily, she opened her eyes trying to fathom out what the noise was. As soon as she realised it was the door she leapt out of bed and ran to answer it, fearing it could be news about Lucas. As she pulled the door open she felt her face drop a little.

"Haley." Brooke was somewhat surprised to see the small girl stood on the porch after last nights accusations. She was a little reluctant to let her in, recalling the event but after a moment she stepped aside. Thanking her, Haley stepped into the hallway, glancing at her feet.

"I'm sorry Brooke. I was so out of order last night."

"Yeah, you really were." Haley pulled a face, her cheeks flushing red.

"I was just so worried about Lucas and I really shouldn't have taken that out on you. I'm so sorry. I know you didn't cause his heart attack and to be honest he kind of deserves to be ignored after what he did to you." She rambled on for a moment before Brooke cut her off with a wave of her hand.

"Hales, you're ranting." Haley closed her mouth and blushed again. "You were upset and you lashed out. I'm not a complete bitch, I understand that."

Haley winced.

"I was a complete bitch. I don't know how I can make it up to you."

Brooke sighed. "I don't want you to make it up to me, tutor wife. I just… I want Luke to get better and I want to help Karen. Help me do those two things and we'll call it even, ok?"

Haley stared at her for a moment dumbfounded. That the girl had expected Brooke to freak out upset the cheerleading captain. Did people see her as a dumb, confrontational whore? She hated how wrong people were about her and for once she wished people would see her for who she was and not who they thought she was.

"So, the café and Tric." Brooke murmured, trying to cover the awkwardness. "Between you, me and as much as I hate to involve her, Peyton, do you think we can keep them open whilst Luke's in the hospital?"

Haley studied her momentarily as if she was seeing her in a new light before nodding.

"Yeah, I'll even rope Nathan in. Plus Deb will help in the café."

"Great." Brooke said smiling. "If nothing else we can keep Karen's businesses going."


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N** Thanks for the multitude of reviews. I guess I must be doing something right in this story! Well when I started writing this I had a definite beginning, a hazy middle and a set ending. ultimately this is without a doubt a Brucas but as I'm writing it I'm getting lots of ideas of how I can expand this story and make it a little more entertaining to read. I want to explore the other characters a little bit too and I hope everyone will continue to read as I do this. In my head this is starting to play out like an episode for me so I hope everyone who is reading this is also feeling that!

So for those Naley lovers out there, I can tell you there is going to be some Naley coming up but I promise to keep the Brucas going! I actually think those two are sweet together! Anywho, sorry for taking so long to update. For being so bad I'm going to write the next two parts right now and try and get them posted hopeful before tonight is over : D

* * *

Brooke had gone into what Haley James-Scott had described as Super-Brooke mode. Between her and Deb they had managed to keep both of Karen's business' tidily ticking over. She felt somewhat proud of the cheerleader for her persistence and determination to help Karen out and studying her carefully Haley saw the caring, wonderful side of Brooke that was often hidden under the popular cheerleader. 

"Where do you want these?" Haley asked, holding up a stack of posters.

Tric seemed strange in the day time. It had an eerie empty quality to it that was a little freaky. She was so used to seeing the place bustling full of teenage kids, dancing and having fun.

Haley was so proud of how Peyton and Karen had managed to get the club up and running successful and it really was the only place for the kids in Tree Hill to hang out of an evening. Since the launching of the club there had been a number of live bands that had played the venue and as such it had grown steadily in popularity. Haley liked coming here and hanging out with her friends and husband. It reminded her of the better times that had all experienced in Tree Hill.

"Um… maybe just stick them out around the venue." Brooke said thoughtfully.

Wandering across the dance floor she began randomly arranging the posters around the room, her mind drifting. Lucas had been in the hospital now for over a week. He had needed an operation on his heart to remove the heart tissue that was causing the blood flow to slow down and as such he had been moved to the intensive care unit. Although he was still unconscious –the doctors had kept him sedated to rest his heart – they had high hopes for his recovery and that filled Haley with relief. She loved Lucas like a brother. Him and Karen had been such a huge part of her life growing up that she hated to see bad things happening to them. She loved them both. She wanted Lucas to get well and for things to return to normality again. She missed her best friend.

"This is the last of them." Peyton said as she entered the club, shifting a box onto the bar. Brooke rose from the chair she had been sat on and peeked inside, her face flashing a grin.

"Excellent."

"Brooke, are you sure this is a good idea?" Peyton asked after a moment. Haley glanced at the brunette and for a second was convinced she was going to have to break up a fight between the two girls. However Brooke seemed to be in control of her temper these days and so merely shrugged.

"Why wouldn't it be a good idea?" Brooke asked.

"The club nights… I've always had Karen to help organise them. I don't wanna screw this up."

Brooke gave her a patient look and shook her head.

"Every Friday is your weirdo rock night thingy. This Friday isn't going to be any different. And you wont screw this up 'cause me and Haley are helping. Besides you do most of the work for these things anyway. It will be fine."

Haley couldn't help but smile at the sight of the two estranged friends together. Up until Luke's accident, she couldn't remember the last time she had seen the two of them talking like this together. It was nice to watch. Although she knew they would never be friends like they were it was great to see them at least talking and sharing a joke. She felt as if there was hope for them both. Maybe they could be reconciled someday. She hoped so. They had been friends for such a long time.

"Are you done over there tutor wife?" Brooke asked, calling Haley by the nickname she gifted her some time ago. Rolling her eyes playfully, Haley wandered over.

"Yes. What's to do now?"

Brooke pursed her lips pensively and glanced around surveying the scene they had created for this evening's event. In truth she had done a wonderful job. The club looked great and Peyton's sketched posters hanging around the walls fitted perfectly.

"I think that's it."

"I really hope people turn up to this thing tonight." Peyton grumbled.

"Have you ever done an open mic night before?" Haley enquired, pulling herself onto a bar stool as the curly blond haired girl leaned on the bar.

"She's an open mic virgin." Brooke joked earning a smile from Peyton. It was refreshing to have them getting on and Haley couldn't help but feel her mood lift as the two former friends joked back and forth with her.

"I dunno how this things gonna turn out," Peyton said, "But if worse comes to the worse I guess I could get up and try dancing or something."

"Now that would be worth watching." Haley said with a whimsical smirk.

"I've seen this girl dance. If it comes to that I think we might be better calling the whole night off!" Brooke laughed.

The conversation continued in the same playful tone and haley let her mind wander. With all of the drama of the last week she had barely had time to think of anything but Lucas but now he looked set to recover she brought her thoughts to Nathan. They had married in secret over a year ago and she loved him so much that when she was apart from him she missed him with a dull ache. She knew it was pathetic to feel that way about a guy but the two of them had just clicked. It was as if they were meant to be together. That said, she was worried about him at the moment. He had become distant over the last couple of days and at first she had assumed it was because of Lucas. However Lucas was recovering well and Nathan's silence was growing more profound with every day that passed. She wished he would talk to her but he was so proud. He tried to deal with everything by himself.

"Hales?" She snapped her eyes to Peyton and glanced between her two friends who were both studying her anxiously.

"Space out much? What's wrong?" Brooke asked concerned.

For a moment Haley wondered if she should say anything but she needed to talk to someone and with Lucas out of action her options of people to confide in were limited.

"I'm worried about Nathan. He seems so… so quiet and distant and he wont talk to me." The words tumbled out before she could stop them and she felt herself blush.

"Maybe he's worried about Luke." Peyton offered, her brow furrowing a little.

"I don't know. I think its more than that."

"Talk to him." Brooke said. "That's the only way you will get to the bottom of it."

Haley had tried to talk to Nathan this morning but he had shrugged her off, insisting he was fine but she knew her husband well enough to know he was anything but fine. Something was troubling him deeply and the fact he was pushing her out frightened her. Maybe he didn't want to be with her anymore. The thought hit her in a rush of almost physical pain. She couldn't stand to lose him and if he wasn't in love with her then Haley had no idea what she was going to do.

"Well if that's it you guys I'm going to shoot off." Haley said, grabbing her bag, not wanting to stay and chat about it. "I've got some stuff to do before I head up to the hospital."

Haley headed back to her apartment thinking about the situation with Nathan. What was wrong with him? He was usually so attentive towards her and this dismissive behaviour was beginning to unsettle her.

Pushing her key in the door she stepped into the silent apartment and shrugging her coat off, she draped it over the back of the sofa. She stopped suddenly hearing a banging sound coming from the bedroom. Thinking Nathan must have come back early from basketball practice she called out to him but getting no response she frowned.

"Nathan?" She called out again, glancing down the narrow hallway to their room. Still getting no answer she felt her heart beat quicken, her breath catching in her throat. Who the hell was in her bedroom? Her mind imagined the worst possible scenarios, burglars, murderers… and as her adrenaline pounded around her body she felt nauseous. Another bang brought her back to reality and hastily she glanced around looking for some kind of weapon. Picking up the nearest object she carefully pulled a saucepan off the draining board and slowly moved towards the bedroom.

Had Haley thought about this sensibly she would have left the apartment and called the cops but in that moment all she could think about was someone was in their home, in their bedroom. That thought forced her down the corridor. Pausing before the door, she shifted the pan in her hand and pushed it open. All she saw was a tall figure move towards her before she lifted the pan and screamed.


	11. Chapter 11

"HALEY!"

At the sound of his voice she stopped her hand an inch from his head. How she managed to exert such restraint she didn't know. Nathan was frowning deeply at her as he released the grip on her arm, removed the pan from her hand and pulled his headphones out of his ears.

"Where you planning on _panning_ me to death?" He asked, somewhat puzzled.

"Well… you… you didn't answer when I shouted you." she muttered in way of explanation, feeling rather foolish for trying to attack him with a pan.

"I had my music on." He said pointing to his recently removed earphones. "Had I known you were going to attempt to bludgeon me with a kitchen utensil I would have just stuck the stereo on."

She blushed pulling a face.  
"Sorry. I thought you were a burglar."

He rolled his eyes. "You called out to a burglar?" She winced, realising how stupid that was.

"Well…" She broke off not sure how to answer that. "I didn't think. Oh come on Nathan, I totally could have taken you with that saucepan!" She grinned but he merely shook his head at her.

"You gotta look after yourself better than that Hales. I mean I'm not always going to be here to protect you."

What did he mean by that? His words frightened her. Why wouldn't he always be here? Was he leaving her? Insecurities washed over her. She had never really believed she was good enough for him. He was the most popular boy in school and she was the geeky tutor girl but she loved him and she believed he loved her. He had loved her enough to marry her, to move in with her but he was so young. Had he changed his mind about the whole thing? What worried Haley mostly was that he hadn't talked to her about his feelings. Aside from being off hand for the last couple of days there was no warning that he was feeling this way. It had come out of the blue. Her eyes fell on the bed suddenly. Strewn across the duvet was a series of papers.

"Are you recycling?" She asked with a laugh but he hurriedly collected them up, shoving them in the top drawer of his nightstand. Haley was completely baffled by his abrupt behaviour.

"It's nothing."

He turned his back on her, pan in hand and headed towards the kitchen leaving Haley baffled in the bedroom. She glanced at the drawer, knowing she shouldn't look but curiosity got the better of her. She hoped it would hold the key to his behaviour. Quietly pulling the drawer open she studied the papers he had momentarily put in there.

"Life insurance…" She muttered under her breath, unsure of what to make of it. why was Nathan looking at life insurance. Puzzled and not to mention worried about him, she shoved them back in the drawer. Following him into the kitchen she watched him placing the pan back in the cupboard, her stomach doing somersaults.

"Nathan, what's wrong? The last couple of days you've been weird with me, and now you're saying you're not going to be around forever? What's going on?"

He turned to her, shrugging.

"Nothings wrong."

Frustrated she scowled at him.

"Nathan! You're freaking me out."

He glanced at her, his jaw slack. From his stance she could tell he was ready to explode but he didn't. Instead he merely sighed.

"I'm sorry. Its not you. Its me."

"That's just another way of saying it's totally me." Haley sighed deeply, wanting him to just talk to her. "Nathan, tell me what's going on. Why are you looking into life insurance?"

He frowned, pausing for a moment before he spoke.

"Since Lucas had his heart attack it's just got me thinking about stuff."

"About what? Life insurance?" Haley asked puzzled. Nathan gave her a level stare but then sighed.

"if something happens to me, I want to know you're going to be taken care of."

"Nathan, nothing is going to happen to you." his mood was so morbid that it frightened her to hear him talking like that.

"Look at Luke, Hales. One day he was just getting on with it and then the next he's in hospital fighting for his survival. It scares me."

Sighing again, haley moved over to him and slipped her arms around his waist, nestling her cheek against his chest. She was relieved that it was nothing to do with their relationship. She wished she wasn't so paranoid at times.

"Lucas is gonna be ok, Nate."

"It scares me Haley to think that one day I won't be here to protect you, to look after you."

She reached onto her tiptoes and brushed his lips with hers.

"I love you Nathan Scott and you're not going anywhere soon so shh.."

He smiled at her faintly but it faded after a moment.

"Luke's so young and HCM has ruined his life. He could have died."

"But he didn't, Nathan. He's going to be ok."

"Hales, there's a chance any kids we have will have this condition. There's a chance that they could have a heart attack at sixteen, that they could need a transplant or worse." He moved away from her, sinking onto the sofa and after a moment she followed him, sitting beside him.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. At least we'll be aware of HCM and can have our baby tested." She stopped, jumping a little. _Our baby?_ That sounded so serious. Nathan glanced up at her.

"Are you ok?"

She nodded unsure of what she was feeling about that word. Baby. Shaking her head a little she brought her mind back to the conversation.

"Lucas is going to be fine, we're fine. Stop worrying."

"Sorry Haley."

She kissed him again.

"How come you're home so early? I thought you had practice."

"Whitey let us go early 'cause we were training like crap. Everyone's thinking about Luke."

She sighed not knowing how to drag him out of this mood.

"Do you fancy Tric tonight? Peyton's got an open mic night on."

Nathan shrugged. "I guess." He got to his feet. "I'm going to shower."

Haley watched him go with a heavy heart. She had never seen him so down and hoped that he would pull himself out of it.

* * *

Dreams are strange things. You can't prove they happened to anyone. You can't replay them. Half of the time you can't even remember them. Even so the ability to dream is something everyone has in common. But have you ever had a dream that seemed so real? A dream where you could touch and smell and taste everything? These dreams are wonderful. Lucas drempt of Brooke whilst he lay unconscious in the hospital. She lay in his arms and kissed him. Her hair smelt so good and she smiled at him with such warmth. These dreams are the ones that people try to remember. These are the dreams that no one wants to wake from but as Lucas opened his eyes he was dragged back to reality by a sharp pain that made him groan. For a moment he thought he was dreaming but as the pain intensified he realised with clarity that he was awake.

His chest felt so tight that trying to inhale almost made him pass out and his left arm was numb. Carefully he turned his head to the side, trying to decipher what the hell was going on and as his mind sorted through the images he realised he was in a hospital room. Memories of his heart attack came back painful and he vaguely recalled being in the bathroom of Tric. Everything after that was a blur.

In the chair next to his bed a girl was sat, her eyes closed. He smiled fondly at her and tried to speak but his mouth was so dry that it merely came out as a cracked noise. At the sound her eyes flickered open however and she smiled.

"Hey you." She murmured.

"Brooke…" It was all he could manage to say. She leaned over, stroking his hair.

"Shh, don't talk."

He closed his eyes, opening them after a moment, still aware of the pain in his chest.

"What happened?" He asked after a moment.

"You collapsed, in Tric. Do you remember?" He nodded vaguely recalling the agony he had felt. "You uh, you had a heart attack Lucas."

He heard what she said but his brain didn't register the words for several seconds. When the realisation hit him he still couldn't fully comprehend it. A heart attack? He was only sixteen. How could he have had a heart attack? It didn't seem possible. He didn't really know what to do with that information and simply stared at the ceiling wondering how this would affect his life. Brooke gave him a small sympathetic smile.

"I'm sorry Luke."

"How long have I been out of it?" he muttered softly.

"A week. You've been on some pretty heavy drugs and then you had to have surgery. You've been drifting in and out of sleep all today but this is the first time you've managed to stay awake."

A week? A whole week of his life had passed without him even being aware of the fact. It felt bizarre. He felt her hand slip on top of his and glanced at her.

"I know this must be hard for you." She said softly.

He wondered if she did know how hard this was for him. He had just been told he had been unconscious for a week and that he had not only had a heart attack but also surgery in that time. He wanted to ask more from her but he was so tired.

"Lucas?" He opened his eyes and gazed at her.

"Yeah?"

"I'm really sorry."

"For what?"

"That night in Tric… Adam… I wasn't trying to hurt you by bringing him." She frowned deeply, trailing off, clearly unsure of what she could say to make the situation better. Lucas sighed. He didn't know what she wanted him to say to that. What did she want from him? Although it pained him to say it her expression was so hopeless that he forced himself to do so.

"You don't have to apologize. You didn't do anything wrong. Why shouldn't you move on?"

Glancing at her hands, her brow furrowed deeply. Her lips began to form words but she didn't speak for a moment. His eyes felt so tired that they burnt as he forced himself to stay awake.

"I thought… I thought I was going to lose you." her eyes misted and tears flowed freely down her cheeks.

"You're not going to lose me." He mumbled.

"Lucas, I'm so sorry."

"Me too."

He was exhausted and the need to sleep was so overwhelming that his body forced his mind to shut down. He blinked trying to force himself to stay awake but his eyes closed of their own accord. As sleep took him the last thing he heard was Brooke speaking to him, her voice a mindless droning.

"Lucas. I know it's unfair of me to do this to you right now. But I have to say it." She hesitated taking a deep breath. "Lucas, I love you."

He wanted to respond but his body seemed paralysed. He opened his mouth but his body was numb. His eyes closing was engulfed in swirling blackness as sleep took him.


	12. Chapter 12

It was an hour before Tric was due to open for the open mic night. Everything was set up and ready to go and so Brooke had taken a seat at the bar. Mulling over her visit to the hospital that afternoon she felt stupid for telling Lucas that she loved him. It was true, she _did_ love him, but even so she had not meant to blurt it like that and worse still he had fallen asleep as she had said it. She knew it was not his fault and that the medication he was on made him sleepy but she had expected more from her revelation. With hindsight she knew it was ridiculous to tell Luke her feelings after he had only just woken up from a potentially life threatening condition but in that moment she had been forced to. She doubted she would have the guts to tell him how she felt again.

"Ok, we're good to go." Peyton said, leaning her elbows on the bar. "Sound system is all ready, DJ is setting up, bar's stocked and the door staff should be here in twenty mins as will Deb."

"Great." Brooke muttered her mind still on Lucas.

"You ok?" Peyton asked.

Brooke glanced up at her, her brow furrowing. Her and Peyton had hardly spoken for the last year and it seemed weird to be having a conversation with her former best friend. Brooke took a lot of comfort from her presence and for a second she could imagine they were kids again. Life had been much simpler pre-boys. Since guys came onto the scene nothing had been right between Brooke and Peyton.

"Just thinking."

"Don't hurt yourself." Peyton joked.

"Did you ever love Lucas?" Brooke asked, the words spilling out of her mouth before she could stop them. For a moment Peyton looked shocked at the question but after a moment she shrugged.

"I thought I did."

"But you don't now?"

"Luke's a part of my life, Brooke, like you are… _were_." She corrected herself. "and when me and him kisse-" She pulled a face, stopping herself from saying the word. "I don't feel the same way now. I don't _want_ to be with Lucas. We're friends and nothing more. I mean at the time I had just got out of a crappy relationship with Nathan and you know me and him weren't exactly the best couple. Luke was nice to me at time when I was vulnerable and hurting. I loved him for that and maybe I let that cloud my actual feelings but he's been gone from my life for a year now. I've had a lot of time to figure out a lot of stuff. I don't want Lucas. I promise you. I just… I want us to be friends again, Brooke. I miss you. I need you to be a part of my life and I hate that you're not."

Brooke sighed deeply, a mixture of relief and regret. She was relieved that Peyton had moved on from Luke. It made things so much easier but she regretted that they hadn't sat down and talked about this before.

"I… I miss you too, Peyton." The blonde haired girl smiled but Brooke waved her hand slightly as Peyton opened her mouth to respond. "But I love Lucas, I love him so much that not being with him hurts. I need to know that you're not gonna make a move on him again."

"I may be blonde but I'm not that dumb." Peyton said with a dry laugh. "I'm not gonna stop talking to him but I swear I don't feel anything more than friendship towards him."

Satisfied, Brooke nodded and for a moment the two girls merely stared at one another, wondering where they would go from here.

"So uh… you and Lucas huh?" Peyton muttered after a moment, breaking the silence. "You love him? Thats uh pretty deep."

Brooke frowned.

"Yeah it is and yeah I do love him. I told him as much last night."

Peyton moved closer to her. "What did he say?"

"He fell asleep." She said wrinkling her nose but Peyton laughed.

"Typical guy! I swear sometimes they will do anything to get out of committing!" Brooke glanced at her and then laughed.

"I know. To be honest I don't think it was the best thing to tell him when he's medicated so much."

"Meh," Peyton shrugged her shoulders. "When else can you get a guy to listen to you?"

They continued to talk and joke. It felt so good, so natural to be laughing with her. It was almost like old times. She hadn't realised how much she had missed her.

"So I take it you've ditched the tall dark stranger from the other night?" Peyton said. "Lets celebrate being single… even if it is only for a couple of hours!"

Brooke froze. She had completely forgotten about Adam.

"God. I'm an evil bitchy bitch ho." Brooke rambled.

"No your not. You and Luke have been like soul mates forever. That guy's been around for all of ten minutes! It's gonna be hard but if you wanna be with Luke, you gotta get rid of the baggage."

As cold as it was to hear her describe Adam as baggage, unfortunately it was true. Brooke hated to hurt him but she had to break up with him. She wanted Lucas too much. She felt guilty however. Adam had been so kind to her. It wasn't fair on him. She reasoned however that leading him on was even more unfair.

"This is nice, huh?" Peyton said. "I can't remember the last time we talked like this."

Neither could Brooke. They had grown so distant that she had not imagined they would be able to fix this at all. She had not imagined the two of them would ever be friends again but as they sat at the bar in Tric it felt as if nothing had ever changed between them.

"Yeah, we should definitely do this more often."

"What? Talk or run a club together?" Peyton grinned.

"Both." The brunette laughed. "We drink in enough of these places. We should be able to run one with our eyes closed!" Peyton laughed and then glanced at her watch.

"Hey, you know there is still an hour left on visiting at the hospital. If you left now you will just make it."

"I can't leave now." Brooke protested, making lame excuses but Peyton shoved her purse into her hand.

"Would you just go already? I can take it from here."

Brooke smiled.

"Thanks Peyton."

"Don't mention it." She said. "But just remember you owe me one."

Driving to the hospital Brooke felt excited and scared at the same time. She didn't know if Lucas had heard her proclamation of love for him before he had fallen asleep but she knew in her heart things would work out. They were supposed to be together. He was the guy for her. Smiling she parked her car and headed up to his room. Trembling a little she paused at the end of the corridor and taking a deep breath she moved towards his door. As she glanced through the glass window she stopped suddenly, her heart sinking.

Lucas was propped up in the bed, a multitude of pillows behind him. Sat at his side was a beautiful copper haired girl. They were smiling warmly at one another and she had hold of his hand. The girl rose, stroking his hair before kissing his cheek. Brooke froze at the sight of her and stepped back from view, not wanting to be seen. Who was that girl? She seemed overly familiar with Lucas, like they were… a couple? Her heart sank. After everything she had been through to get to this point she had been beaten by this skinny red head at the last moment. Turning hastily she wiped the tears from her cheeks and all but ran out of the ward cursing her own stupidity.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N** Ok this is the last chapter I'll post tonight (or today for everyone in America!). I know everyone is anxious to get to the Brucas and I promise it is coming but I'm a bugger and I like to build tension! Lol! Thank you all for taking the time to read and review, I cant believe how many people have reviewed! I guess I must be doing something right! Anywho here it is. Hope you like it and as always let me know what you think!

* * *

"Are you listening to me?"

Lucas snapped his eyes from the patch of ceiling he had been engrossed in to glance at Haley. She was staring at him with an irritated expression that made him shift uncomfortably in the bed.

"Sorry…"

"What's wrong with you broody boy?"

Lucas wanted to tell her about Brooke but he didn't know what to say. She had told him she loved him. He remembered her saying those words to him before he had fallen a sleep and he had expected her to come to him to talk about it. However he had not seen her for three days and his frustration was mounting. He wished he could see her but the doctors didn't think he would be well enough to go home for a while yet. He needed to talk to her. How could she ignore him after telling him that? Maybe she had got cold feet? Either way her absence had been noted.

"Nothing. Um, how's things with you?" Haley gave him a sceptical stare but turned back to him. She shrugged.

"Things are… fine." It was his turn to give her a sceptical look.

"What's the matter Hales?"

She frowned.

"I don't wanna put any crap on you, Luke."

"Its not crap. Come on, talk to me."

"It's Nathan."

"I guessed it was. What's the problem?"

"He's just… I don't know. I think this whole thing has freaked him out. He's just not himself. I'm worried about him, Luke."

"You talked to him?"

"I tried to and he did talk to me but I think he's holding back on me. I think there is something else worrying him but he won't talk to me about it."

"You know Nate, Hales. You've gotta just sit him down and make him talk."

Haley sighed.

"I know, but that's easier said than done."

A comfortable silence enveloped the room as they both mulled over their own problems and after a moment Haley spoke again.

"So what's your deal? And don't tell me its nothing."

Scowling Luke replied. "It's Brooke. She told me… she told me she loves me."

"Well that's good, isn't it?"

"You would think so. The last time I saw her was three days ago. She's avoiding me and I don't know why." Pursing her lips thoughtfully, his best friend leaned back in the chair.

"I dunno. She hasn't said anything. Saying that I actually haven't seen her for a couple of days either."

That worried Lucas. It was bad enough he hadn't seen her but if she was avoiding her friends as well…? What on earth was wrong with her? He didn't understand at all.

"You're a real jerk Lucas Scott."

He glanced up at the rage-filled blonde girl who had entered his room, her hands set on her hips, her face contorted angrily. Puzzled at the hostility towards him, he frowned at Peyton, giving her a questioning look.

"What did I do?"

"What did you do? God! You're an ass! Its bad enough that you broke Brooke's heart but then she takes a chance on you and tells you how she feels and you throw it back in her face!"

Still completely baffled, Lucas tried to speak but Peyton cut him off with a furious wave of her hand.

"You know, if it wasn't for the fact you've just had a heart attack, I'd bounce your skinny ass all over this hospital! I thought you were a better person than this Luke but obviously I was wrong! How could you do this to her? After everything she's been through! If you didn't want to be with you then you should have told her rather than hooking up with some dirty skank! And don't bother denying it, Brooke saw her kissing you! D'ya know she was coming over that night to ask you out? But you royally screwed that one up! Stay the hell away from me and definitely stay the hell away from Brooke."

Without giving Lucas a chance to explain anything, she stormed out of the room leaving him completely gob smacked. He blinked at the door way, unable to comprehend what had even happened.

"What the hell was that about?" He demanded, glancing at Haley but she was shooting him a dirty look.

"Is that true? Have you hooked up with someone else?"

"Haley-"

"Is it true?"

"I don't know what the hell is going on."

Haley grabbed her bag, getting to her feet. "You don't know? Or you just don't want to admit it?"

"Haley!"

"Do you know I had a massive argument with Brooke the night of your heart attack for bringing Adam to Tric and rubbing your nose in it? And all this time you have been seeing someone else! You have just made me look such an idiot."

Lucas tried to explain but she had stormed out of the room before he could even tell her anything. Scowling he sank back on the pillows, his mind reeling from the battering he had just received. So Brooke had seen him with a girl? He tried to think who and with a dull realisation he recalled the visit he had received a couple of days back. Realising how it must have looked he inwardly groaned.

* * *

Haley returned home furious. Lucas had made her look a complete fool. She had had a go at Brooke for rubbing his face in it with Adam and now he had a secret girl. Scowling she headed up the steps to the apartment. Entering the familiar surrounding she called out to Nathan but getting no response figured he was out.

How could Lucas do that to Brooke? He had told her he loved her but his actions did not say that. She dragged the fridge open and with a sigh realised she should have bought some groceries. Pulling out the few ingredients she could find she set to cooking, losing her thoughts in the rhythmic preparation of cutting and chopping. As she calmed down she realised she might have been a little hasty and possibly should have listened to Lucas' side of the story before going off at him. She didn't understand what was wrong with her at the moment. This was the second time she had flown off the handle at one of her friends.

She glanced up at the sound of the front door opening and smiled as Nathan entered. Garbed in a baggy basketball jersey, he dumped his rucksack on the floor and wandered over to her, slipping his arms around her waist.

"That smells good. Is there enough for two?" He asked kissing her cheek.

"Of course." She pulled out of his grasp and turned to face him, looking into his eyes. "Nathan, I don't want to keep going on at you but what's wrong? Please talk to me."

He rolled his eyes a little, his stance defensive.

"Nothing is wrong! Jeez, are we gonna have this conversation every time I come in?"

"Nathan!"

"Just forget it Haley!"

He stormed off, leaving her staring after him. What on earth was that about? She exhaled, frustrated, throwing the wooden spoon into the pan. She heard the shower going and wondered what was wrong with her husband. He was so moody. She just wanted him to talk to her and tell her what was wrong. She hated that he was pushing her out. They were married, they were supposed to work their problems out together but Nathan had a habit of pushing her out whenever things got tough. It was the one aspect of his personality that drove her insane.

She glanced behind her as his cell began to ring. Calling him, he didn't respond. He was obviously ignoring her or he couldn't hear her over the shower. Wiping her hands on a tea towel she walked over to his rucksack and unzipped the front pocket. As she opened it something caught her eye. Pulling out the piece of paper she roved her eyes over it, her hand covering her mouth. She had to read it twice to believe what it said and even then she couldn't take it in. Her body trembled as the shock hit her. How had he kept this a _secret_?

"Are there any clean towels? I cant find any in the-" She stood to face her husband, the letter still in her hand, trying to hold back her tears. Nathan's eyes flickered from her face to the piece of paper in her hand. "Cant a guy get some privacy?" He snapped, seizing the letter off her.

"Nathan…"She all but gasped out. "How could you not tell me about this?"

His shoulders were squared, his stance tense. "You had no right to read that."

"I had no right?" She demanded incredulously. "You're my husband Nathan! What affects you, affects me! How were you planning on keeping this a secret? Do you not think I might have found out eventually? Where you even planning on telling me?"

He shrugged. "I'm dealing with it."

"You're dealing with it?" She challenged, gesturing at the letter in his hand. "That really looks like you're dealing with it!"

"Haley, stop worrying." He grumbled.

"How am I not supposed to worry about _that_ Nathan?! We owe three lots of rent! I thought we had paid." He frowned.

"I had to use the money for other bills."

She pressed a hand to her head, a headache forming under her temple, her mind reeling.

"Well now they're going to evict us." She drawled. "And what other bills? We've paid everything else."

He scowled. "I told you I'll sort it. Just get off my back, ok?" he turned to walk off but she grabbed his arm.

"You are not walking away this time, Nathan. You better tell me what the hell is going on. Why haven't you paid the rent? Where did the money go? I gave you it! I put the money in your hand! What have you been doing with it?"

He lowered his head, a pained look on his face. Haley felt more worried in by his silence than anything else. What on earth _was_ he doing with the money?

"Nathan…?" She ventured, frightened by his hopeless expression. He glanced up at her.

"I need to tell you something."

She studied his face for a moment, her whole body going cold. Steeling herself, she prepared herself for the worst.


	14. Chapter 14

Brooke had spent the last few days stewing over what she had seen in the hospital. What hurt her the most was that Lucas had lied to her again. She wondered if their relationship would ever happen. There was always so many things getting in the way. She felt a pang of regret that she had split up with Adam but her head was all over the place and it wasn't fair on either of them to be in a relationship at this time. She never wanted to hurt him the way Lucas had hurt her. she recalled his face when she had told Adam it was over and cringed. Breaking up was always hard.

She knew Luke would leave the hospital soon and although she longed to move out she was not in a financial position to do so. She had nothing but the small amount of cash her parents sent her from time to time. She did not think she oculd face lucas after seeing him with that girl and her helplessness at her own situation frustrated her more than anything else. Was she doomed to spend her life wanting a man who constantly hurt her? sighing at the injustice of her situation she rose from the bed and wandered over to the dresser, idily tidying the already clean surface, absently moving things around simply to keep herself occupied. She was almost grateful for the knock on her door. It gave her a reason to halt her mindless cleaning. Thinking it must be Karen she walked over to the door and pulled it open.

"Lucas!" She gasped. He was holding his chest, his face pallid. He looked like death, wincing with the effort of standing. Quickly she aided him into the room, gently lowering him onto the edge of the bed. "What are you doing here?"

"You've been avoiding me." He muttered with a groan, his eyes shutting tightly.

She shook her head, irritated at his stupidity. He should not be here. he needed medical care. _This is just like him_, she thought, _making everyone worry about him_. He was so selfish at times! She wanted to be angry with him. She wanted to scream at him for being an absolute idiot but his expression was so pained that she found her heart pounding with fear. He looked so unwell that she worried he would collapse at any moment. She reached for her cell but he grabbed her arm.

"What are you doing?" He demanded.

"Calling an ambulance. You shouldn't be here. you could hurt yourself more."

"Brooke…" A small groan escaped his lips. "Please… I need you to listen to me."

She gave him a sidelong glare, unable to believe he wanted to talk. Did he not realise the risk he was taking? He was recovering from a major operation. His stubbornness made her scowl.

"We can talk later. Right now we need to get a doctor to you."

"I'm fine." His voice wavered weakly but his eyes were set. He was giving her a look she recognised immediately; he would not be argued with about this. Sighing she reluctantly placed her cell back on the side and turned to him.

"Five minutes, and then I'm calling for help, ok? What do you want to talk about?"

"The other day… in the hospital. I don't know what you think you saw but I promise it was not what you think."

Turning her gaze from him, she rolled her eyes. He had left hospital for this?!

"Lucas-"

"Just listen to me. The girl you saw me with… its really not what you think."

"Then what was it, Luke?" She demanded, trying to control her emotions. She didn't want to unnecessarily upset him. "I saw her _kiss_ you."

Lucas sighed. "Her name is Kerry. She's… well she was Keith's girlfriend."

Brooke blinked at that. It was defiantly not the response she was expecting. Unsure of what to say she found a sanctuary in being angry with him.

"That is the lamest, dumbest excuse I've ever heard."

"Its true all the same. She teaches at the college Keith works at. They started seeing each other about a month after we moved there. She was practically living with us for the last nine months."

"So what happened?" Brooke asked, still not willing to believe his story.

"I don't really know. Keith wouldn't talk about it but she left Charleston and went back to her parents for a while and when she came back her and Keith were just friends. She helped me a lot in the first couple of months. I was a mess when I first left Tree Hill and she gave me a lot of support. We were close and when Keith told her about my heart attack she wanted to see me." She sat in silence for a moment, wondering if he was telling the truth. "You can meet her if you want to. I think she would really like you."

Brooke glanced up at him, he looked tired.

"We really should get you back to the hospital…"

He grabbed her hand.

"Brooke, I swear to you there has been no one else in my life since we broke up. You told me I could get over you in ten minutes but truthfully I haven't got over you and I dont think I ever will. When I told you I love you I meant it and I heard you the other night when you told me you love me."He sighed. "I want you! God, I love you! Doesn't that mean anything?"

"I love you too." She conceded finally. "But I have to know you're not going to walk out on me again."

"I promise. I will never leave you again."

She felt her resolve weakening. She wanted to believe his story about Kerry. She wanted it to be true and more than anything she wanted him. She was drawn to him like a moth to the flame, oblivious of the dangers that lurked by getting too close. She didn't want to get hurt again but she needed to be with him, no matter how bad for her he was. Lucas smiled at her, and for a second he looked like the old Lucas she remembered from a year ago: young and carefree. They both sat looking into one another's eyes, lost in the moment. Leaning forward they both moved towards one another and hesitantly brushed lips. It was an almost awkward kiss but as it continued they both succumbed to the passion and longing they had been holding back. She felt his fingers mussing her hair as he showered her with kisses down her neck. It felt so good to have him this close to her and she tipped her neck back to give him better access. She hadn't realised how much she had missed him until this moment and with a bolt of clarity she knew everything would be all right.

"Luke-" She murmured, her lips still pressed to his. "We really should get you back to the hospital." It was said between kisses but Lucas shook his head, pushing her gently back on to the bed.

"The only medicine I need is you."

* * *

A/N Ok so that last line was beyond cheesy but meeeeh! Love IS cheesy. sorry its only a short one but there you go! Hope you like. Thanks for all the reviews, let me know what you think of this one 


	15. Chapter 15

Haley couldn't believe this was happening. She glanced at her husband who had dropped onto the sofa and buried his head in his hands. What was he hiding?

"Nathan?!" She exhaled frustrated. "Talk to me! What did you have to tell me?"

He had said those words and had not spoken a word since. After a couple of minutes haley found her irritation rising. She needed answers. He shifted his gaze to her and sighed deeply.

"I borrowed the money off the rent to pay the electricity."

She gave him a level stare. He was lying to her.

"But we paid that."

"No we didn't. Our money only goes so far and I'm really trying to make it stretch but it doesnt," He said with a slight touch of bitterness in his tone, "I lost my job."

The shock of that hit her hard. "But you've been going to work every night."

"I've been looking for work every night." He raked his hair back, his voice dropping low. "I finally got myself something but by that point we got really far behind in all our payments Hales. We've never caught back up."

She frowned, feeling guilty. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want you to worry. I thought I could sort it. I thought I would be able to find something straight away but no one wanted to hire a high school kid."

Sighing she moved over to him and sank down besides him.

"So where are you working now?"

"In a little store just out of town. It pays ok but we're so far behind with our payments that it's not making any difference."

Haley wondered how they were supposed to get out of this mess. Her job in the café only gave her a small amount of cash and although she had a little saved aside it wasn't enough to stop them getting evicted. She wondered if there was any way she could get in touch with her parents but they were off on the long road somewhere, travelling. They were on their own in this.

"What are we going to do?" She asked him, fearfully.

He took her hand and squeezed it gently giving her a reassuring smile.

"I'll sort it out."

"Nathan, you cant fix everything by yourself!" She exclaimed. "Don't push me out of this, it is both of our problem." She hesitated before speaking but with a deep breath she knew she had to say something. "You're going to have to ask your mom or dad for the money."

"Are you crazy? They're not going to help us."

"They might surprise you." Haley replied. "Besides, what choice do we have? If we get evicted we're screwed, Nathan."

He glanced at her, a look of defeat on his face. She could tell he knew she was right but that he was loath to ask. Although haley understood his reluctance she also knew they were desperate. He would have to push his pride aside and ask for help. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her gently on the lips.

"I love you Haley James-Scott and I'm sorry I never told you but I just wanted to protect you." She pulled back and glanced up at him.

"You don't have to protect me from everything Nathan. Sometimes you've got to let me take care of you."

He kissed her again, caressing her cheek as their lips met. Haley knew there was nothing he could do to disappoint her but she wished he would be more open with her. she hated that he kept secrets. They were supposed to work things out together. Loosing herself in his embrace she knew somehow that they would be ok.

* * *

Brooke took Lucas back to the hospital and after a long lecture about the dangers of discharging himself and running off he was led back to the room he had previously occupied. Exhausted but exhilarated he lay back in the bed and thought about Brooke. He loved her with every fibre of his being. He wanted her so much and it felt wonderful knowing that he now had her back in his life. He had never imagined that they would get back together; it always seemed so far on the horizon but lying in each others arms on his bed at home they had confessed their love for one another. Lucas would never forget that moment. He knew he would be with her forever and despite his heart condition and all the things he had lost through it none of it mattered. He had Brooke, and she loved him back. Knowing that was more important than school, college, even basketball. For the first time since he had returned to Tree Hill he finally felt like he was home.

* * *

**A/N** Sorry that chapter was SOOOO Long in coming. I have been so busy this week.To be honest I think that is probably were I will end this story. I cant really see any other storylines developing from that apart from chapter after chapter of Brooke and Lucas making out and as nice as that is its dull to read and even more boring to write. If anyone has any ideas of how to continue this or even wants me to continue let me know what your thoughts are but I personally think this story is spent (it is 21,000 words!) and I dont want to be the type of writer who continues a story for the sake of it! I just want to say a huge thank to everyone who has reviewed. I cant actually believe how many people have! It really means a hell of a lot to get positive feedback and I'm sorry this chapter is so goddamn short but its just tying up loose ends. 


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N** Ok so I was going to end it with that last chapter and despite conflicting views from several reviewer, having read it back myself I agree that it needed just one more part to round it up completely. I hadnt really given much thought to Haley/Nathan and I suppose in my own mind I had figured they would be ok. I hadnt really accounted for you guys wanting to know what happened to them! which was a complete and utter over sight on my part so sorry for just leaving you guys hanging there. But anyway, this is it. the end. No more! I'm out of amunition for this story now. Lol! This story has been fun to write but I'm glad its done! Let me know what you think of this ending instead. I think I have pretty much resolved EVERYTHING now! Thanks to everyone who reviewed and for your comments. Its always helpful to receive advice and it does make you a better writer.

* * *

Nathan wasn't particularly looking forward to facing his mother. They had hardly been close since he had married Haley. She didn't approve of her stealing her little boy from her and potentially ruining his life. Nathan understood that her fears came from her own experiences with his father but he wished she would understand that Haley was nothing like Dan. Unlike his parents he was happily married and although they had had some teething problems in the early stages of their marriage it was nothing like his parents.

He had decided to ask his mother for the money rather than his father. He knew Dan well enough to realise that whatever he gave him would come at a steeper price than what he had lent. Walking up the drive way of the familiar house that had once been his childhood home before his emancipation he paused at the door and knocked, his eyes roving around the familiar scene, wondering if there was any way he could get the money without asking for help. However, he was desperate and desperate times called for rather desperate measures. After a moment the door opened a crack and his blonde haired mother appeared. She frowned a little seeing him but then smiled.

"Nathan! What a wonderful surprise!"

Taking a deep breath, Nathan walked into the house as she opened the door further to let him step in. for a brief second he wanted to turn and leave, feeling his mother's hand closing around him, suffocating him, stopping him from being who he was but it passed as swiftly as it had come. He was not under her grasp yet and hopefully if she would help him he would not ever be. Following her into the kitchen, he declined her offer of food and took a seat at the breakfast bar, wondering how to start this conversation.

"You look well." Deb said, pouring herself a coffee and joining him at the bar.

"Thanks." Nathan muttered.

"How's school?" He shrugged.

"Same as always."

"Your grades are ok?" She asked. Nathan didn't want to make small chat with her but he needed her help. Humouring her he nodded.

"Yeah they're fine. I'm doing good in class. I uh got a new job."

"Oh? Doing what?"

"Just retail."

An uncomfortable silence developed and for a moment Nathan wondered how they had come to this. Surely it was not normal to feel this awkward with your own mother and yet the nature of their relationship had been such for so long that he couldn't imagine sitting down and talking to her about normal every day stuff.

"How's Haley?" Deb said after a moment.

"She's fine, mom. It's just…"

"Just what?"

Nathan paused, wondering about the best way to tackle this situation. He knew he had to be careful about how he asked for the cash or else he ran the risk of his mom telling him no. taking a deep breath he raked his hair back off his face.

"Mom, I'm in trouble." His brow knitted as he said it and when he glanced up at Deb she too was frowning.

"What kind of trouble, Nathan?"

"I got into some money problems and they're threatening to take the apartment unless I get them the cash immediately." He buried his head in his hands. "I don't know what the hell to do."

Deb went silent for a moment and Nathan wondered what she was thinking. Did she see this as a perfect opportunity to have Nathan move back home with her. He would never say it to her face but he would rather live on the streets than be thrown in between his parents arguing again. In the early days of Deb and Dan's divorce he had been nothing more than a scrap of meat to be argued over. It had been some of the most unpleasant months of his life. He didn't want to get back into that situation again.

"How much do you need?" Deb asked after a brief silence. Nathan winced.

"Just over two thousand dollars."

"Nathan!" She exclaimed. "How on earth did you get yourself in such a mess? I really think this living by yourself crap isn't the best idea for you!"

Scowling, Nathan found his defences going up despite willing his temper to remain calm. "Well whose fault is it that I'm living by myself? If you and dad had just sorted your crap out without dragging me into it…" He sighed, trying to calm himself down. Getting angry was counter-productive. He needed her help and screaming wasn't going to get it. "I love Haley, mom, and my life is with her. Our apartment is part of our life. If we loose that we're both homeless."

"You have a home here Nathan!"

"But Haley doesn't?" He snapped. "God mom, when are you going to realise that me and Haley are married and that we're going to spend the rest of our lives together."

"Come to me, Nathan, in five years time when all your dreams are broken, when all your ambitions are dead and when your life has become nothing more than a passage into slavery. This dream of love you talk about doesn't exist. I was in love with your father and look at me now."

Nathan rose to his feet and dropped his hands onto his hips, frustrated at the way in which the conversation was going. It was an enviable argument but it wasn't one he relished in having.

"I love you mom but I won't choose you over Haley. If you won't help me then I guess I'm homeless. Live with that on your conscious." He turned to walk out but Deb called him back.

"Nathan wait." He glanced over his shoulder at her and resisted a small smile as he realised she was waning. "I would never see you on the streets, no matter how much I hate it that you live with her. I'll give you the money."

Grabbing her purse off the side she pulled out her cheque book and wrote him one for his rent and handed it to him. Nathan lowered his eyes to it and saw that it was made out for five thousand dollars and snapped his gaze to her.

"Mom this is wrong… the rents only $1700."

She gave him a wry smile. "I might regret giving you this Nathan but it will see you sorted for a while at least. Just spend it wisely, ok?"

He glanced at her, frowning deeply. "Why have you given me this?"

"Because you're my son Nathan and I love you. I can't just switch my feelings off and pretend you don't exist and I can't sit and do nothing when you're in trouble. I just… I just can't."

Nathan smiled a little at her, feeling as if she had just solved all of his problems in that moment. they could pay their outstanding rent and with this money they could pay at least the next four months or so and have a little left over for bills. As always Haley had been right. She had said his mom would help him. Somewhat hesitantly he embraced Deb and for a second he almost wished he could get his relationship with his mother back. However he was not naive and he realised that it would take time and even then he was not sure it could happen. Tucking the cheque into his jacket pocket he turned and left.

* * *

_**A Week Later….**_

"Have you got the balloons?" Brooke demanded at Haley from the bottom of the ladder the small tutor was precariously balanced upon. Pushing the tack into the corner of the 'Welcome Home' banner, Haley turned and glanced down at the brunette cheerleader.

"They're on the side in the kitchen." Brooke half turned but stopped herself.

"How you doing Haley?"

"What do you mean?"

"You and Nathan. I said you guys were having some problems, I just wondered if you had sorted it."

Haley smiled slightly and nodded. "Me and Nathan are going to be fine."

Truly glad to hear this – after all Haley and Nathan were the ultimate couple, if they couldn't make it no one else stood a chance! – Brooke turned around, spinning on her heel and with a slight skip, headed into the other room and rooted through the grocery bag until she had located the packet. She could hardly contain her excitement at Lucas' return home from the hospital and although she knew she grinning like an idiot she didn't care. She knew somehow everything was going to get better and that her life had some kind of direction now.

"Hey…"

Brooke glanced up at the familiar voice and half smiled at Peyton as she entered through the back door. She wasn't sure how she felt towards the blond haired girl but she liked that they were at least speaking again. Brooke wasn't sure she was ready to call her a friend yet but she hoped in time it would come. She had lost so much by distancing herself from her former best friend and she just hoped that it wasn't too late to fix it.

"Hey."

"Do you need any help?"

"Uh…" Brooke glanced around and then threw the balloons at her. "You can help me blow these up."

Peyton caught them and ripped the packet open, handing Brooke a balloon. The pair of them shared an almost comfortable silence for a moment before Peyton spoke.

"You looking forward to Lucas coming home?"

Brooke smiled broadly. "Yeah, I am."

"I really hope things work out between you two, Brooke and I really mean that."

"Thanks." Brooke replied, truly meaning it. She didn't particularly need Peyton's blessing but it was almost a relief to have it.

"Brooke?" She turned as Haley entered. "The living room is done."

"Good." Brooke said clapping her hands together. She could hardly contain her excitement.

The three girls sat and talked, laughing and joking as they continued with the party preparations. It felt so nice and for the first time in a year Brooke felt contented. She hardly noticed the time flying by until Nathan pushed the door open and appeared with a number of their friends. Skills and Mouth took position at the kitchen counter and began to help, although they were more of a hindrance than anything else. It wasn't long before Lucas himself arrived.

For a moment the boy looked confused at the people crammed into his tiny house but then he laughed and embraced everyone in turn. Brooke watched him with a knowing smile on her face and after a few minutes he headed over to her grinning.

"Was this your idea?" He asked, dropping his hands around her waist and lowering his head to kiss her.

"It might have been." She replied whimsically allowing him to kiss her. "Do you like it?"

He glanced around the room pulling a face. "Well…" Smacking him in the arm he grinned, kissing her again. "I love it. Thank you."

She pulled out of his kiss for a moment and gazed into his big blue eyes, wanting him so badly in that moment.

"Luke?"

"Uh huh?" He muttered, gazing warmly at her.

"You do love me don't you?"

He leaned into her and brushed his lips over hers. "Does that answer your question?"

"Not really, but it helps."

"Brooke, I love you with all my heart. You're the person I want to spend the rest of my life with. You're the person I want with me, at my side when all my dreams come true."

She kissed him. "Then I'm the person who will be stood at your side Lucas."

Lost in each other's embrace they held each other never wanting to let the moment pass. Brooke realised that love was the strangest of all the body's needs. It's not predicable. It's not always right but when you find that one person you love and who loves you back then keep hold of them and never let them go. Brooke knew now that she would never let Lucas walk away from her again.


End file.
